A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes: My boyfriend and I have been together for 10 months now. In the beginning of our relationship he was very sweet, loving, and very dependable. For the past few months he's been having self-esteem problems. They gradually get worse and worse and on some days it'll seem like nothing is wrong at all. When he is in bad moods where he feels like he's worthless and horrible I try my hardest to convince him otherwise but I just can't get through to him. In the process he is distancing himself from me and I feel that he is losing interest in me. He also never talks to me about what bothers him. This really hurts me and makes me really sad. I feel that I'm walking on eggshells and if I say something wrong that it'll make things worse with him and that I'll be pushed farther and farhter away. I love him with all my heart and I hate that this is happening. I don't want to break it off either. What am I supposed to do when he is in these moods. He tells me I help but each day it just gets worse. I'm so confused and hurt.
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female
reader, Moo's Mum +, writes (4 July 2010):
Oh doll this is hard for you! Honestly I think he needs a wakeup call because he's wallowing in this misery and at the end of the day he's the only one who can sort it out. No one else can do it for him. I would say to him "Sweetheart I love you, you mean the world to me but I can't deal with this anymore cause it's bringing me down too. I'm going home until you sort out your head. Ring me when you are happier." Then as hard as it will be walk off. You can't keep propping him up all the time you have needs too.
A
female
reader, JKLivinLily +, writes (4 July 2010):
Some advice that I can offer you is that maybe he needs to build his trust in you again. You can start talking to him about things that have been troubling you and by exposing yourself to him he'll begin to build trust and eventually he may open up to you. Also, by you starting the conversation with something you're frustrated with he won't feel so alone and it presents an opportunity for him to get what is bothering him out in the open too. Just don't put the point on him by saying it's him that's bothering you, it'll only make him feel worse so just try to stand on his level for a bit and he will feel more comfortable to express what's inside.
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