A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:[Mod note: the title of this question is in the poster's own words, although the remainder of the post does not reference bipolar disorder.]My boyfriend and I have had some ups and downs lately. He has been drinking lot lately, and I don't like to see him when he drinks, so we haven't seen each other much, and I have had some things going on myself. I tried to call him last night, but his phone was switched off. He sent me a text this morning, saying that he is going away tomorrow, and doesn't know when he will be back. He also said that he hopes we will see each other again, but he said he thinks that I don't care any more. I tried to call him again after he sent the text, but his phone was off again. Do you think he really will go away, or is he being manipulative to try and get me to go round to his house or something?. Do you think I should go there?. Should I stay with him or dump him?. I don't think he can think very much of me if he is willing to go away without me,and without speaking to me or meeting up with me first, and how can he expect me to wait around until he comes back?.
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female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (9 February 2014):
 Okay he has bipolar. No need to explain in detail about his symptoms and what he did. For some people they don't know what it is like to be with a bipolar person.
It is a debate whether bipolar people has the ability to manipulate, like do pets manipulate you to give them food? Or is this survival tactic? You have to separate the drinking from his disorder. If you can't deal with a drinker it's a deal breaker. He might be using alcohol to self medicate but if a normal person drinks too much and it offends you, you treat them the same way. You decide if you can be with an alcoholic or even a temporary alcoholic.
If you want to stick with a bipolar person, be prepared to push your needs aside and emotionally cater to him. Be prepared that no amount of reassurance would ever be enough. Loving him is like pouring love into a never ending, bottomless abyss. You love him for who he is, which is a person with bipolar who may or may not recover in the future. What are the rewards of staying with a bi polar person? Nothing much, just to prove that you can survive the bumpy ride.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 February 2014): dont dump him until you go to his house and have a chat. try telling him that you do care, and see where it goes. if he still doesnt value you, then drop him. p.s. in the title, why does it say he has bipolar?
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