A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend has a strange attitude toward gifts. He has never bought me anything, but rather creates all his presents for me himself.I don't have a problem with handmade things. They are wonderful and thoughtful. My problem is, the quality of my boyfriends handmade presents. My boyfriend is studying book illustration at his school. He loves art and he is amazing at it.However, all his presents to me, which he has drawn himself, are really messy. The canvas is ripped, the paint is smudged or water stained, it's only half-finished, or sometimes its just a crumpled rough drawing ripped out of his notebook and rolled up (last years birthday present) I know he can do better. I've seen his class projects.He's a great boyfriend, but he doesn't seem to understand the present thing. I just don't get it, and it's starting to hurt my feelings. What do I do?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 January 2013): one of my ex bf's always used to give me handmade gifts too. But they were awesome, as he is very talented and is practically a master craftsman. I would always feel guilty that what I gave him was store bought. I still have every gift he gave me, not because there are any lingering feelings (there aren't) but because the gifts are so unique and well-made that it would be a shame to throw them out and because my name is engraved on them I can't exactly re-gift or re-sell them.....
if your bf insists on hand-making gifts for you yet clearly didn't put effort into it (for his level of ability and skill), then that's just plain lazy and cheap.
A
female
reader, deirdre  +, writes (19 January 2013):
I agree wholeheartedly with the 3 answers in the middle of this page. you deserve better x
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (18 January 2013):
 Yeah he is cheap : and lazy.
There's nothing wrong with homemade presents, IF they show care and effort.
I dabble in oil paintings, I made one as a present , I could only work on it a couple of hours a week ,..it took me about 8 months to finish it, so 60 - 65 hours work. Even considering my time as worth minimum wage,or less, it's still an expensive present, LOL ! The person who got it was absolutely thrilled , not so much I guess for the dubious artistic value of the object ( well...it wasn't THAT bad either ...:) , but for all the time and attention and effort I had put in it.
Ripping some slapdash sketch whichever from your sketchbook is not a present, is a bad taste joke !
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A
female
reader, sammi star  +, writes (18 January 2013):
 Home made presents are the best, they're personal and show the persons really thought about you. Usually. Doesn't sound like he's putting much effort in though if the pictures he's giving you are ripped and stained! What sort of presents do you give him? Maybe you should match his standards from now on!
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465  +, writes (18 January 2013):
 You write: "... but he doesn't seem to understand the present thing...."
Would you please explain just what YOU think is "the present thing"?
Good luck....
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