A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: My boyfriend broke up with me even if he likes me a lot..So, I cried so much yesterday when he broke up with me, we knew we will beak up one day thats for sure.THe thing is he still likes me he adores me and I know that, but he broke up with me because in Sept. im moving to the UK and we wont see each other very often, and he knows its going to be very hard to break up then, so he thinks better to break up now than later when its going to hurt. Plus both of us are currently very busy, so we see each other only like 3 a week.We were friends for 4 years and this happened, and in the beginning of the relationship we were like 'lets try at least'. BUt now its so hard. at least we want to keep on being friends and be in touch, etc.Its so hard, i cant stop crying, not sure what to do? Any opinion or advice on this?I think this is the first time i cried over a breakup... thanks x
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 March 2014): I think he was very wise to break-up now. He didn't want to prolong the pain; and you both can begin the detachment and grieving process sooner than later.
I know it hurts to give up someone you care so much for. He is being very unselfish by giving you up, so you can prepare yourself for the departure.
Long-distance relationships are agonizing, and really aren't as fulfilling as what you have now. He knows you will hold on as long as you could. That wouldn't be doing either of you any good.
Start letting go. It is the only way you will be able to function and deal with it, when the time comes for you to leave. Then you have to settle-in and start adjusting to your new home and life. You are already unable to maintain much time together; which is a preview of the things to come after you leave.
Do your best to deal with all this. He doesn't want to pine and suffer. He shouldn't. He should be able to get on with his life, and continue to find happiness. As should you.
I know this is difficult from all angles. Words don't soothe the pain so easily; but time and distance will. The mind has to go through a process of letting go, it is a period of withdrawal. Breaking ties. It's a lengthy and grueling period. So prepare. It gets worse before it gets better.
You'll both get through it. Prepare your mind like you'll never meet again. It will allow you to accept love and companionship with other people the future. You should not be frozen in time and denying yourself love; because you can't get over each other. That isn't healthy for you, and your boyfriend is very smart to already know that.
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