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female
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*ess1011
writes: I have been with my boyfriend a few months and we have had sex a few times, however even though we are both legal his mum found out and has stopped him from seeing me and its really affecting our realtionshipI really love my boyfriend but he listens to his mum and has stopped txting me during the day or when she is around. His mum thinks i was his first but i was far from it, however she thinks of me as a slut when I have only had sex with one other person. I really want our relationship to work i just dont know if it will please help.cheers xx Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 August 2006): A guy that really loves and cares about you would not care what ANYONE says. Whether it's friends, family..whoever, it dosen't matter! All that should matter to him is that he is with you and he loves you. He should be thinking, if his family and friends don't like you, then that's their problem and he is still going to be with you. He should be making it clear to his mum that he loves you and he is going to be with you whether she likes it or not!
A
female
reader, Wendyg  +, writes (18 August 2006):
 Sounds like me but this was nearly 15 years ago! He was my first steady boyfriend slightly younger than me and his mum found out we were sleeping together.. She did everything she could to break us up.. from not allowing him to call me or come over to my house, when i was at his house we were not allowed upstairs just in case we got up to something... Would mumble stuff under her breath and so on... He did what his mum said as it was her house and he didnt want to upset her and she just considered me to be a wild girl, er he was my first and he had been with several other before me but anyway... she didnt want to change her opinion of me and could understand her not wanting us to have sex in her house i respected that, but not allowing us to have any privacy was driving us mad... anyway he had two sisters... she didnt seem to worry about them was just him, mummys boy and all that... we had been dating for 2 years and she still had a fit about it, but then one day his sister came home and just said to his mum cant you let the boy grow up .. they have been dating all this time and you wont let go!! etc etc.. she must have listened because then she was cool with me... dont know what changed but she suddenly must have realsied we were serious and i wastn going to take her son away and turn him in to a monster lol I think thats what happening here, shes scared of losing her son, no matter who you are shes not gonna like you cos your doing things with her son that she doesnt approve of! She thinks you will lead him down a dark path and ruin him... all you can really do is bide your time and stick by her rules and carry on seeing each other where and when you can and just go with the flow... it took 2 years for his mum to accept me (we lasted for 6) so if you guys are meant to be together you will find away! Just be polite to her, dont give her any just cause to not like you, just pretend she does like you and maybe when your over at his house, try and help out withthings, get yourself involved with her so she can see that your nice girl and maybe in time will accept you.. as for him not texting etc when shes around, you may have to live with that for a while as hes not gonna what to upset her, so just do whatyou can and relax the longer you guys are together she will see that your not a flash in the pan and that your intentions are good and will hopefully come around to the idea... shes just being overprotective it happens she doesnt want to lose her son and hes respecting her, try to chill about it, where there is a will there is a way and if you guys really want to be together you will overcome this, its not easy i know, but the more serious you get the more she will probably come around to the idea.. if you really want to be with him dont let her come between you, there will come a time when he will say something as he cant go through life with his mum slurring his girlfriends, so stick with it and hopefully it will turn out good in the end. He will in the end start to think to hell with it and will text you when shes around and he will take the attitude that shes gotta get used to it, which in the end she will have to.
Take care x
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female
reader, nicki +, writes (18 August 2006):
look if your boyfriend listens to his mum then hes not worth it if he cant see that your not what his mum thinks you are he aint worth it you you are legal age so you both should be going by your own decisions i know you say you love him but my advice to you is calm down before you get hurt and be careful with what your doing
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