A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I've been with my seventh boyfriend now for about ten months and everything between him and I is going pretty decently. Although I'm quite sure he is not the one for me, I still like him a lot and that's why I'm staying with him.My issue is my best friend, whom is a guy. We've been best mates since the diaper-age and he has always been there for me! It used to be where my past boyfriends would have to be "approved" by him in order to date me. It went the same way with his past girlfriends and I.Anyway, lately, my best friend has been acting very strangely and he's even starting to hurt my feelings now! I don't think he intends to, but ever since we graduated from high school last year (2008) and I started dating my current boyfriend about a week after that, my best friend has been extra quiet around me.He gets mad when I even mention my boyfriend; he accuses me of things he himself has done in the past; he thinks we don't spend enough time together when in fact, I spend more time with him than with my own boyfriend!He has NEVER physically abused me, though... ever. And he never would. He has never verbally abused me, either; he just likes to spend time with me. And the feeling is very much mutual.Now I'm a pretty content person and I sometimes wonder what it would be like to date my best friend, but then I think, 'That is just too strange.' I mean, don't get me wrong: I love my best friend! But I'm about 75% sure I love him as only a friend. So basically, what do I do about this situation?
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male
reader, philipfromsheffield  +, writes (8 March 2009):
I'm guessing that this current boyfriend is for you a longer term one than the other 6? I'm also thinking that your best friend may have more feelings for you that you care to think about or admit. If he wants to spend that much time with you, he doesn't have a clear recognition of your relationship with your boyfriend. You also have put a 75% figure that you only love him as a friend, that leaves a huge 25% of you maybe thinking that you may be good togther in a relationship? He will know and recognise this, as as he is in the same age bracket as you, he will be developing greater relationship understanding, and maybe understand what he wants. Could it be that you and your best friend could have something more that you admit? Think about it.
A
male
reader, InsideTheFire0603 +, writes (8 March 2009):
What things is he accusing you of? Sounds to me like he's just jealous of you spending to much time with your bf, and he misses your attention. My g/f had the same problem, but all she did was just spread her time more evenly between me and her mate, and everything was fine:) I think your issue is you just need to spend more timje wth your best mate and make him feel a little bit more appreciated
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