A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Right.There's a boy with a girlfriend. I'm in love with him.He's my best friend.He always asks me to go places with him on our own and when I say " Won't your girlfriend hate the idea of this?" and his reply will always be " It doesn't matter coz if she does, then she doesn't trust me." Or he changes the subject completely.Last night I was at my other friend's house but I was upstairs on my own becoz I was upset.My best friend and his girlfriend were downstairs but he came up on his own to speak to me and he stayed up there with me for about half an hour looking after me.At one point, he hugged me and didn't let go when I thought he would...But THEN, we nearly kissed but I just moved my head and turned it into a hug.Later on in the evening he came up again and was tipsy.He hugged me again and as I looked out of the window he hugged me from behind and kissed my back.I shook him off becoz I knew it wasn't right. He then said " I love you *Jessie* " and then went down stairs.Was this just a drunken thing to do?I know I can't be with him.Please don't think badly of me... I didn't mean to fall for him.. I loved him before he met this girl but it was too late to tell him how I felt.Should I tell him how I feel? - should I say " I can't see you that much anymore as my feelings for you are stronger than friendship and I don't want to jeopardize what you already have with *Sophie*" ??
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female
reader, Pork Hock  +, writes (21 May 2007):
First of all you aren't in love with him. He has wised into the fact that you are the good mate of his girlfriend and he just wants to try and see how far he can go. Anyone can do the long meaningful hugs, call you by your name and spend 30 minutes with you...A.) he doesn't love you because he basically tells you when you ask him about what would his girlfriend say, he basically says it doesn't matter because she clearly doesn't trust him" like I haven't heard that before. Oh she doesn't understand me and if she can't accept me then she doesn't deserve me or basically what he is saying is it is her fault for not believing his complete pack of lies. Have you ever thought if she is asking the same questions, are you cheating on me etc? This lad is just wanting to knotch up another hole in his belt and unfortunately if you do, do the deed with him, his girlfriend will be mightly pissed at you not him...it isn't right but that is what happens the girl wears the Scarlet Letter...look it up. It is something communities did to girls/women who had basically followed their hearts, or had it off with a man or even been raped...I am not saying you have to feel the same, but don't put yourself under his deception of everyone. He is a loser.
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