| A
female
,
anonymous
writes: I am in a relationship already and my best friend just told me that he is in love with me. Im in love with my boyfriend so the only thing that can happen is for my friend to stop loving me. My friend has been in a situation like this before and he said the only way for him to get over that girl was to completely forget about her but i dont want that for us becuase he is one of my best friends.Is there any way he can fall out of love with me without losing our friendship?
View related questions:
best friend Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (29 December 2008): Hey.. I know what you mean.. Im in the same situation.. I love her to death, She likes another guy.. But their not dating.. It hurts so bad its un explainable.
But from my point of view ive learned.. that friend? Yeah.. he will never stop loving you im sorry.. And if i was him.. I would respect you and keep it held inside.. I for one am going to tell her tomorrow haha what a coincidence right? I feel your pain. But sometimes we have to cut the line, And tell the friend point blank that we dont like them the same way. Hes not really your friend if he can forget you so easily.. I said those EXACT words once myself that hes said.
"I have to totally forget about them" Haha.. i was so silly a year ago.. If he treasures who you are and really loves you, He will stay your friend, And your friendship should be enough for him. I cry every night, As im sure he does to, But dont feel sorry for him. Tell him point blank rather then leading him on, Thats my answer for you.
A
male
reader, seanjn  +, writes (19 December 2008):
i am in love with my best friend. she has a boyfreind, whom she loves. i confessed to her and told her i could no longer be her freind. i dont think this guy can be your friend.
you cant work through it. if you love your boy freind and respect your freind. then contact should be severed, its the only way i will eventually get over it. Ya, i lost my best freind and that really sucked, but thats reality
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 March 2008): i love a 23 y/o and he used to love me the same way...he told me that he would wait on me to be of age (i'm 17) and he was completely great, but then...he kinda changed his mind, and i understand that. it's been hard for me, but i got over it, and now him and i are even better friends than we are before. mabey you should tell you friend that he will hurt for a while, and mabey you should help him get through it, but i don't think that he will completely stop seeing you if he really loves you. or even if he is just a good friend. friends always find a way to stay together no matter what, and if he doesn't understand that then he's not your true friend.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 December 2007): Well, before you do anything hasty, test YOURSELF. See if you could love your best friend. First just ask him to slow down and give you some time to think. Don't forget he's your best friend. Think about what you'd rather lose, Your boyfriend or your best friend. And once you've thought enough about it, tell either of them how you feel.
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (3 December 2007): I'm in a similar situation. I'm married, but I've always had close female friends - never a problem. But one of my friends (Girl-A)likes me (a lot). A mutual friend (Girl-B)told me in confidence that Girl-A told her that I am just the kind of guy she wants to be with. I've known both ladies a whilst and I really trust them - I have no secrets from them, but I don't know myself how I can stay close to someone if they have a burning desire for me. I really don't want to hurt Girl-A, but if she comes on strong at some point then I'll just have to be polite as possible and maybe let things cool. I won't shut someone out coz they have feelings but I know I need to keep things straight!
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (7 October 2007): don't take the advice of the other two. I know how your friend feels. I too am in love with my best friend and she deeply loves her boyfriend. she knows how I feel but her and she dose not wont to hurt my and still by friends. You should try and help him to get thuogh is with out losing your friendship. I hurts alot on this said too. Me and her have growen closser even thuogh I love her and she loves her boyfrined. good luck to the both of you^_^
...............................
A
female
reader, pica +, writes (29 November 2006):
I think this 'friend' should have kept his mouth shut given that he knows you are in a relationship. Also he's being manipulative with his threat to stop seeing you. Actually that might be best - he's not much of a friend. I think it would be hard to go on as if nothing has happened, and what do you do about your boyfriend? Do you tell him? How would he feel? Staying friends could well be trouble. You might be best getting some distance from this guy anyway, time to cool off.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 November 2006): Tell your best friend straight that you have a bf that you love and adore and wouldn't do anything to hurt him. Tell him to back off because it isn't going anywhere. If he doesn't take the hint then start pushing him out of your life until he does. If he is such a good friend he will take this and keep friends, if not then you will have to learn to live without this person in your life. You have a life and you shouldn't feel guilty about hurting his feelings too much.
Take care
xx
...............................
|
