A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My baby is almost 1 year old now and I still haven't got my sex drive back. It's a bit upsetting that I don't seem to want to have sex any more, my poor husband is finding it very hard to deal with. It's not that I don't love or fancy him coz I do, Im also very happy in every other life aspect and love being a Mum, I'm just never in the mood and when we do have sex I have to force myself!! Can someone tell me if this will pass or do I need to see a doctor?
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female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (21 March 2016):
 See your doctor. Not because there is anything wrong with you, but this sort of thing can be helped. Although, in order for the doctor to help you, you must be able to talk to them honestly. I find this to be difficult, especially since I have a male doctor, and the female doctors I used to have were not nice people and looked down their noses at me (which is why I switched to the male one, he does excellent work and actually listens...). I had the same problem after going on birth control. Switching birth control helped me once before, so I went to the doctor to try and switch again. I just found it difficult to talk to him about it because I felt embarrassed :p It's not that easy to discuss such private matters! But I got it across somehow by talking about how I haven't felt like myself and that my mood wasn't like it used to be...
Then there could be any number of things, such as stress, little sleep, or your body having entered a different phase in life. Sex drive is something that changes in life, it's not constant. But adding more or less estrogen and hormones changes the balance in the body and has an impact on your sex drive.
So, first off, new contraception if you're on hormonal contraception. Or, try a hormonal contraception if you're not already on it. Second, make sure you get enough sleep. Third, buy a new bra.
A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (21 March 2016):
 I would go see your doctor. It can be your birth-control or the fact that you are NOT on BC. It might be that you do NOT want another baby right now and in your head sex=baby.
And it can be that your hormones are out of whack.
By the way, forcing yourself to have sex doesn't exactly help you or your partner.
Lastly, when you DO have sex... do you enjoy it?
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