A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:hey, i really need advice. a couple of months ago i looked through my boyfriends phone and i found that he was sending credit to his old number. so the next time i was in his house, i had a snoop and found the second phone with his old sim in it. i was shocked to find out when i turned it on that he wasnt texting other girls but was texting lads. he had a load of gay videos in it and some texts were dirty.. he's using a different name. i dont want to confront him but i dont know what to do. i was so loved up with him but now i just have anger towards him. and i hate me for not knowing.. he doesnt act gay and loves having sex, i really need to talk to someone. help!!
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female
reader, YouWish  +, writes (23 June 2010):
 Oh boy. Yeah, you will definitely have to confront him, especially if he's been having anonymous sex with random guys. Don't wait on this either.
You will also need to have an STD test done, as casual sex with strangers is a very dangerous and risky undertaking.
Don't beat yourself up for not having seen this earlier, and just be relieved that you did in fact spot it before it was too late and you became married or pregnant.
A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (23 June 2010):
 In my opinion it doesn't matter what gender he's cheating with, cheating it cheating. You don't get one of each! How would you react if he was doing this with another woman? You need to confront him about it and do not let him try to turn the tables on you by accusing you of snooping. Yeah you were snooping, but you snooped for a reason and found he was doing something way worse.
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