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female
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anonymous
writes: Hi I am in a teenage crisis...I am 13 years old and have been going out with a guy for 5 months now and we both want to have sex but we are mature enough for our age and we are going to wait at least a year. The thing I'm saying is...my mum doesn't think I have ever had a boyfriend before and if she found out I had kissed one...snogged one...got off with one and all that goes with it. We have even shared a bed before but NO sex and I don't want to lose my mum or my boyfriend or any one. So should I tell her or just leave things how they are and just meet and have a snog because if she thinks I'm going to meet him I will think it is OK and we may end up in bed. Please help. I am so confused Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, xxxsoulsistaxxx  +, writes (16 February 2006):
 You are very young and you do need someone to talk to about these thoughts about having sex at this age. Maybe not your mum, if you're scared she will take it badly, but a trusted adult like a counsellor, teacher, aunt etc? Someone who you trust to keep it secret and who will give you good advice about contraception and stuff.
You may think you're mature enough to have sex but make sure you know this for certain before you do. I know so many people will say to "you're too young, don't do it!" and we both know you're not going to listen but just take your time. Virginity is a special thing so cherish it and when it goes, make sure it's the right time, right place and most of all, right person.
Good luck
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2006): talk to your mum. she was once 13 as well and may have some advice for you, or may be able to assist with birth control. as for the sex, 13 is a very confusing age for males and females. introducing sex into your life has many consequences that you may not forsee. I would suggest waiting, and that is advice from a males expierience.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2006): No matter how mature you are for your age, having sex for the first time will take away a part of your innocence - it will push you that much further away from being a kid.
Everyone thinks that's great when they're a kid, but once they are older, without exception, every single one of them wishes they'd waited a bit - not been in such a hurry to grow up.
You should definitely talk to your mother. As mature as you are, she must be a great mother. I'm sure she has some wisdom she could share with you. Talk to her.
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A
female
reader, Jordan +, writes (16 February 2006):
 Hey i'm fifteen and if i were you i'd tell you're mom i was sort of goin through the same thing but i wasn't thinkin about sex... when i told her she was happy she wasn't mad or anything she reacted really cool as a matter of fact she took me out to dinner lol... but the whole sex part in my opinion you're only thirteen and i think you should wait because that's a big stepa nd u may regret it later... butifyou're dead on n nothing is going to chnge your mind i'd tell your mom so she can put u on "the pill" before you go and do it... jus make sure you really like him k
Love,
Jordan
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A
female
reader, gems +, writes (16 February 2006):
i think you should be honest with your mum,tell her about your b/f. I think she would appreciate it. As for the sex part, that part is up to you, but go slow as you may regret it. sex cant be a beautifull part of a relationship but you need to be sure that your ready for this big decision.
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