A
male
 ,
anonymous
writes:Hi. I own my own business and have done well / been lucky. I have a lots of money. This, I'm finding however, is bringing me problems.Two problems mainly.1. I am attracting girls who are interested in me AND my money. They expect me to treat them out to meals, holidays, gifts, etc. Which I sometimes do. But I'm also a down to earth guy and personally I'm not too interested in spending money or accumulating "stuff". 2. The kind of girls I like - the outdoorsy, cute, outgoing, free spirited kinda gals, quite often find my money a turn-off. They think I'm one of those "rich jerks". Which I'm not. I drive a nice car but that's really my only treat.Any advice? Any nice girls out there who are not put off by money? How do other rich guys maintain relationships without letting their money get in the way and start to destroy things?
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 March 2006): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks everyone for their answers so far. Bev, really great answer and interesting story. Beentheredone that some ideas for me to think about, thanks!
A
female
reader, willywombat +, writes (5 March 2006):
 Sounds like you are the one with the hang up about your money. The girls you date dont need to know about it unless you tell them after all do they....
PS Can I have a sub?
;-)
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A
female
reader, Angelicc +, writes (5 March 2006):
 theres no need to lie to a girl about your money, all you've got to do is to try not to flash your cash. keep the fact that your rich on the down low let a girl get to know you, go thro alot dates before you tell her about your finanical status. as money is a blessing and curse
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A
female
reader, Bev Conolly  +, writes (5 March 2006):
 I'd suggest (if you haven't already) that you put a large share of your money into long-term investments, where you can't get at it for several years. Then you have it, but "don't" have it, if you see what I'm saying, and you can truthfully answer that, although you're financially comfortable, you don't have a lot to splash around.
Your situation brought back a memory I hadn't thought of for a while, which might give you some insights too. Very briefly, I found myself working in Alaska with a very-wealthy man (millionaire), who, contrary to all normal logic, thought I was hot.
We got into an extremely satisfying relationship and for many weeks, I had no idea at all that he had lots and lots of money. What I found most appealing about him was his low-key humour and his understated self-confidence. I remember being almost shocked when he referred to his finances (he thought I already knew); money wasn't even a consideration.
The lessons I take away from this experience are that: 1) you don't need to discuss your financial status until and if you're good and ready, and 2) you can win women over with your personality alone.
I also tend to agree with beentheredonethat, who suggested that you keep the bling to a minimum, unless you want to attract a woman attracted to money.
Anyway, good luck!
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A
female
reader, beentheredonethat +, writes (5 March 2006):
 Money can be a mixed blessing. It is hard to find someone that it does not dazzle. First, buy an old clunker car. Don't flash money like it has no end (don't bait the hook with flash if you don't want to catch something intrested in flash)
Don't pretend to have any money...if they ask what you do, be honest but extreamly vague.
Always pay...that's a gentleman, not a rich guy.
Do things that are inexpensive until your sure she likes YOU. If you want to attract down to earth...then be down to earth.
If your really well off...rent a second place in a moderate neighborhood. Furnish it with used stuff and BE moderate. You don't actually have to Live there...but that way the girl does not get too much info to fast. If later she asks...it was just your little place to get away from all the stress and be normal. (don't bring the butler..it will tip them off)
yes..there are nice girls who are not put off by money....but finding them can be difficult in a sea of gold diggers. I am not saying be hugely dishonest...simply that after she Loves you...money can be a nice little bonus that comes with your love....not a barrier to meeting and getting to know you in the first place. Just an idea....
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 March 2006): Well dont tell the next girl you meet that you have money then that way they will like the real you and you will be able to find out what the person is actually like.
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