A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I need some advice. Last night some buddies and I went out to a bar. Two girls come up and we engage in small chat. My buddy isn't doing so great with one of them but I think it's going really well with the other. Let's call her Whit.About an hour later Whit and her friend (along with her friends husband) were going to another joint down the street. I was invited and my buddies stayed back. Here is where it gets a little weird. She started dancing with other guys and engaged them in small talk also. So I was unsure if she was just being friendly or was testing the waters elsewhere?? Whit's friends husband saw I got a little uneasy as she was talking to these other two guys and said, "it's okay. you just gotta fight through that." So I did my best to seem like it didn't phase me. She went out for air and some girls came by and were dancing by themselves. One of them bumped into me and smiled and started dancing next to me. It worked out well because I saw an opportunity. I started dancing with them and just as I started Whit came back in and saw. She went straight toward me and said, "hey, can we go to the bar and get another drink?"The night ended and the four of us went out for pizza. They invited me to join them on Thursday to go out again. I ended up driving her home. I walked her to her front door, she opened it and I kissed her goodnight. She smiled so I kissed her again. Well we walked in her front door and there were some stairs leading up to the main door. We made out in that stairway for about 10-15 minutes. It got pretty heavy. Not to be too specific but definitely second base for lack of a better term. She stopped me at one point and said she was very attracted to me but that she wasn't that type of girl to sleep with a guy the first night. I asked when she was off again, and she said friday. I told her that I wasn't off till saturday but that I would try to make it on Thursday. She said not to worry about it and that it wasn't worth it if I had to work.Was she being polite or did she not want me to go? I told her I would see but that I wanted to see her again. I got her number and we kissed goodnight again. She text me to drive carefully and goodnight. When would it be okay to text her? Today? Should I wait at least 2 days? What's the rule on that?Thank you for your help in advance.
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engaged, friend's husband, second base, text Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (20 October 2014):
 She might be trying to stick to some "lame" rule so she doesn't seem TOO eager as well.
This is the hard part when meeting someone new.
Depending on what you texted her, I would wait for her to reply before calling.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 October 2014): No, an hour isn't a long time. Maybe she is at the gym or having her hair done. Assume the best case, until you know for sure it is otherwise. If a woman is interested, she will respond to your advances. She may not be waiting round for your call/text and have a busy life, so don't read anything in to anything. Keep going forward till she tells you not to. If a guy gave up on me because of misunderstanding, I would guess he wasn't that keen. If you are keen, then keep going forward gently. Don't push, don't rush, but go forwards. Be confident, believe she likes you too. If she doesn't reply in two days, then you should forget about her. And don't text again till she does.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (19 October 2014): OP here. Well...I wanted to text her first thing when I woke up but I thought the "rule" was too wait. Waited till late afternoon and its been an hour with no reply. I'll take the good advice on here and not even bother to call if she never replies.
I guess part of me knows she may just be busy but an hour is a long time right?
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (19 October 2014):
I wouldn't WAIT for any specific time to call her, the sooner the better IMHO - IF you are interested then CALL.
I'd also go REAL slow with this one.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 October 2014): Hmm.. She sounds like a bit of a game player to me but if your interested in her then there are no rules. The whole 2 day wait is a game & by the sounds of it she might like that. From a woman's perspective I know I prefer a guy to text sooner rather than later shows he's in to me & shows he's thinking about me.
But if she does not text you back after the first message, do not text her again in fact delete her number and get yourself back to the pub and find a lass that won't dance and chat to other blokes. Actually now I think about it she may have been doing the old 'let's show this guy how attractive I am' It's a move us girls are known for, get other guys to chat us up to basically tell the guy we actually are into that yes! Your lucky! All these other guys want us..... It's a move girls do, not women!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (19 October 2014): The only rule: There are no rules.
If you like her get in contact! Don't play games, whats the point?
Text her when you want, the nature of her reply (eg timing, length, things she says) will tell you all you need to know.
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