A
male
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:How do I compete with the battery-driven, portable (handy! ha!), sex toys?We started a relationship about 6 months ago after knowing each other for years. She's great in bed: very vocal, very definitive, very responsive. Not what my (very) limited experience has covered to date.After some steamy nights, she suggested that she buy some sex toys. How do you answer such a question?Well, I figured I'd get over my initial embarrassment and feelings of inadequacy. She was good at explaining her wants and wishes and avoided hurting my feelings. Ok, great, huh?The 'sessions' were actually pretty good. I was curious and we happily explored. The toys helped to support all night love making. While I (*ahem*) recovered, I was able to 'keep Her going'.Who says romance is dead?So? What am I complaining about? Go on guess!No, I really didn't feel inadequate when compared with Her selection of toys. But here's the rub (sorry!):Since She acquired her stash, She's wanted me round less and less. Also: during the build up of an orgasm, she once uttered: "This is what I do every night! Every night!"I didn't think too much about it. But now I'm kinda putting the two together with the conclusion:She's getting Her sexual release whenever (daily?) she wants; She no longer needs me.She's a single mum and I'm detained far from home usually, so it's difficult to get time together.I reckon Her Silver Bullit has mortally wounded the passion that once drove Her wild for me!What do ya think? How do I present that accusation? Put my foot down? Take Her batteries away?Or, the crunch: Her feelings for me were so shallow (despite Her previous prose) that She's getting here 'requirements' from Duracell. And me discarded?This may appear silly, but it is actually undermining my confidence.I'm trying to get Her to commit; while She's putting distance between us (possibly with a slight humming noise in the background?).
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 December 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionIf I put the physical questions to one side, I reckon She may be using the sex toys to keep from the true intimacy of making love (versus having sex).
Yep, like most questions (particularly Dear Cupids') the answers lie in talking things through with Her.
Another indicator of Her distancing herself: at one point She said that She felt like an exhibitionist (and I assumed not just for my private viewing). I admire Her sexual revolution and prowess, but that's at the expense of getting truly intimate.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 December 2008): Quick question... have you bothered bringing all this up with HER?Just tell her you are afraid she might be addicted to the toys and that they are fun to use to spice things up, but you are afraid she is using them as a substitute for you. And it's making you feel depressed and inadequate.So tell her to cool it with the toys or throw you more action.If she can't commit, then it may be time to move on.Flynn 24
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 December 2008): The toys could actually be a godsend. It's a known fact that a man can never keep up with a nymphomaniac, so instead of wearing you down to a frazzle she's doing the job for herself and saving you an awful lot of effort.
I'm not sure how to put this, but how would you feel after about three hours of non-stop sex and she wanted more, and there's no way that you could see to her needs? That's where the toys come in very useful indeed. As long as you can stay awake, you can keep her 'amused'. I suppose toys are some sort of a substitute for the real thing, but if you're anything like me you'll get pleasure from giving her pleasure whether it's via your meat or a piece of vibrating plastic.
By the way, buying Duracells can be an expensive business. Far better to buy rechargeables and a charger. They say they can be recharged up to 1000 times. That's an awful lot of vibrating orgasms!
If I were you I'd consider myself lucky that I'd got such a partner. Make the most of it because if ever you marry her it'll dry up somewhat.
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