A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi everyoneI have a few questions. Basically i like a girl and i'm not sure if she likes me back, some days i think so, others i'm not sure and i'd love to have the confidence to just ask her but as i'm sure you appreciate, often that is easier said than done and even though that is my eventual aim, I could do with a bit of help to make myself feel more confident!I apologize if these questions seem a bit childish for a 23 year old but I am genuinely interested in knowing what other people think and all of my previous relationships have been with girls who pursued me so I've never really tried to get a girl i really like before. We talk mostly with phone messages due to studying in different universities. I know talking in person is better but that isn't possible right now however i hope it will be possible after my graduation in october.The questions are1) If you liked someone, would you sometimes take a few days to reply to them? I appreciate people are busy and i myself often take a while to reply to even my best friends, however when i really like someone i always find time to reply every day. But i wondered what others think about that and particularly i'd like to know what other women would do in that situation. Maybe some people would want to appear busy or not desperate, i dont know.2) Again a question for women, if someone compliments your appearance and you liked that person, how would you respond?I recently told her she looked beautiful and she said "hehe thank you so much!!!" and then sent lots of smiley faces with hearts for eyes.So that seemed good and i felt very happy but then i wondered if that was just her being polite. She doesn't offer similar compliments to me often but she does seem very shy. She likes my photos when i post them on facebook but doesn't say anything about them.3) She sometimes tells me "i went to ___ today, so I thought of you!" or "i just drove past __, i have really good memories of there with you!" if she goes to a place we have been together. But if i say something in reply to that she doesn't seem interested or maybe becomes shy as she talks about something else. She also tells me I'm a really good friend or I'm her best friend, so i am not sure if these things are flirty or i'm friendzoned? English isn't her first language which complicates things a bit!4) How would you suggest i proceed with this situation? I really like her. She is shy and I am shy too. I want to ask her but i do just need a little something to give me that confidence as i dont want to ruin our friendship. I know the simple answer is just ask her and i do intend to i just wonder if there is some advice someone can give me on ways to show my interest more before that or ways i can have more of an idea about if she is interested or not.
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best friend, confidence, facebook, flirt, shy Reply to this Question
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female
reader, AlisaVali +, writes (21 July 2015):
1) if I like a guy I would maybe do ignore his texts for a few days or hours so I don't seem too desperate or maybe I do this because I'm playing hard to get and show the guy I like that I'm busy doing other stuff OR I want to test him and his reaction, and I do this only A FEW TIMES. But if i do it a lot , then it means that I'm not interested in that guy2) If the guy I like compliments me I would go CRAZY! I would do the same thing as she did * thank you with lots of smiley emojis and hearts!* . and I also NEVER comment on the guy I like photos but I DO like them, because I'm anxious about what to comment and afraid that the comment might look clumsy and awkward! While if I'm not interested on a guy , I would say only *thank* or maybe avoid the whole situation, and I wouldn't even bother myself to comment or like on his photos at all3) She seems interested, I mean she already showed you that she remembers you when she's gone to a place that both of you went to. Its a good sign because she remember moments she had shared with you. And she remembered these memories because they are special, if she wasn't interested she wouldn't bother herself noticing or remembering memories that she had shared with you. I see she's interested from what you've said, because she showed you that you're special to her. And I would actually call the guy I like *best friend or a friend* because I'm afraid he might think I like him while he doesn't , so I just tell him that he's my best friend so I make sure that its too obvious that I like him, and also to avoid any awkward situation or see your reaction.4) I reconned you to take things slowly and never rush, rushing to a relationship is a turn off to girls. Take things step by step and make the first move. Girls like it and they won't forget about it when a guy makes the first move. Hang out with her a lot, ask her to come with you to the cinema etc but in a way that might not seem too needy or desperate for example : *A new movie that seems cool is on the cinema tonight, I might go there and watch it, wanna come and watch it too?* And trust me, when she notice that you're giving her hints that you like her, if she likes you too SHE will also drop hints. She might play hard to play, but she might still flirts and goes out with you. If she's not interested she wouldn't flirts at all or giving you any hints that she likes you. When you notice that she's dropping hints that she likes you, ask her out and even if you're shy, you will feel so much better and confident when you ask her, also she will be super happy. She might refuse the first date ( she might be busy or playing hard to get) but if she accepted the second date , then she probably likes you. If she refuses the date twice then she's not interested. Make sure you keep at least 4 weeks gap between the first rejected date and the second one. .
A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (20 July 2015):
 If I liked someone I talk to them right away. If someone compliments me I just say "thank you," with a smile if I like him too. She sounds like a tourist, or someone who won't stay there for long. That would stop anyone from thinking about dating. If that's not going to deter you, you and her could end up with a kiss, you never know! A great memory is always better than nothing. Just get her to go to coffee with you, then get to know her more.
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A
female
reader, Marebear  +, writes (20 July 2015):
okay so i am a woman and i get we can be confusing sometimes.. it is just in our nature...so lets answer these questions..1) when i like somebody no i do not typically take a few days to text them back.. BUT we do get busy and i know i dont always check my phone right away but when i go on my phone the next time i try to text the person back..2) okay when you compliment a lady we love it!! so her texting the "hehe thank you so much" was a good response. know the smiley and heart faces was good to because people usually dont send heart faces unless they feel a like you 3) when she says she thinks about you when she goes places or things remind her of you.. that to me seems like you too are good friends so that doesn't really seem like she likes you when she says that.. its just her thinking of you..i know i think f my guy friends when i see something that reminds me of them.4)okay i think you should ask her on a date.. you already know each other well so just say " hey do you want to go to dinner sometime?" and she will know that you guys already know each other well so does it mean something more.. if she turns you down then you will know that shes not interested in that way but if she says no thanks then brush it off rand say "oh no i meant it like a friend thing or somethinggood luck buddy i hope things work out and as far as the whole shy thing goes im sorry about that but if you guys are good friends then i you should at least be sort of comfortable around hergood lick again!!
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