A
female
age
22-25,
anonymous
writes:I am in a love triangle. I'm still in love with my ex-boyfriend, who happened to be my sitting mate in high school. And had some feelings for each other but didn't confess our love. Until I traveled to Holland(where I am currently living), and he told me he loved me. Yes, I also loved him but I didn't tell because he was a 'ladies man' and decided to ignore what he said. Two to three years later, he confused his love again and this time, I also told him how much I loved him. We dated for a month or so. And according to a conversation I had with a friend he was dating his girl, who they attend church together. But I didn't take it seriously, because she also told me they broke for almost four to five months then. Until later again, during the girls birthday he placed a picture of the girl, on WhatsApp with the caption "Happy birthday (her name)..even though it's not your day(7th...). ILY??...Enjoy to the fullest ????.Off to school..Bye. Love U". After, reading this I got a broken heart and never talked to him in months, he tried to let his cousin contact me to settle the issue but whenever he brought it up, I would change the topic. Till he got fed up and stopped asking me about it.** All this happen last year**??I moved on and somewhere in February, I found this guy who happened to have attended my high school and he was my senior (a year ahead). But had never really noticed him way back in high school. Expect for the fact that his younger brother was my classmate. And have been in a relationship till now, but somewhere along the line my dad didn't really approve of the relationship (because it was long distance and thinks he must be using me to come to aboard) and 'broke it off. (But still be talking to each other secretly). Because of that, we haven't been really in touch with each other as we used to.During the summer, my ex-boyfriend(my classmate) got in touch and settle our issues and told me perhaps the truth( I belyhim though), that he was in relationship with the girl but broke up and later told me he loves me. And that he was really sorry for what he did and keep me through, all though it wasn't his intention. I forgave him. He then, told me again that he still loves and has loved me since we were sitting mates. To be honest, he is alwayon my mind and have still had feelings or still love him. Which btw way he knows. I told him, I' was a little too late because I am in a relationship and also I've moved(which is a lie because i think about him all the time, and I feel guilty because I'm already in a relationship with a different guy). He told me, he was happy for me, for the fact that I was happy.Now, my question is who do u think I love or should be/ contuine being a in a relationship ?To be honest, I love my ex more but I fear he might cheat on me because he's a ladies man and can be flirty sometimes. He is nice, kind and ambitious but just sacred to trust him and let him in again even though I really love him, And we've always been together and all our classmates kinda want us to get along because they know we love each other. But on the other hand, I love my boyfriend, because he is kind, sweet, responsible and ambitious and has never cheated on me before(at least that's what I know, and believe). And am bad at breaking pples heart. They both live in the same country am the one aboard.Can someone please help me? I'm really confused and eager to get some advice and answers..
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ambition, broke up, cheated on me, cousin, flirt, long distance, my ex Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (28 September 2017):
 I stay stick with the guy you are with. You already know that your ex is a ladies man who cheated on you once even though he reckons he loved you. My guess is he will do it again because he knows he got away with it.
A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (25 September 2017):
 It amazes me every time somebody posts a question, asking a group of complete strangers (us) which of two people would be a better choice as a partner.
Part of me sees it as an attempt to abrogate responsibility for life's choices, passing the buck in some ways so that if the one promoted as the best choice by the volunteers here doesn't work out you can point the finger and say "oh but I didn't make the choice, they steered me wrong"!
Consider a third option, if neither of the current candidate are a clear winner in the race to have you as a dedicated, loving partner then maybe neither is right for you, or you aren't mature enough for a loving committed relationship at this stage.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 September 2017): Thank you, for your advice. ??
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 September 2017): Love the one you're with. The other guy comes in and out of your life. You can't toss people aside just; because some dude out of your past comes along slinging the L-word all over the place. On top of that, he's a known cheater.
So you'll risk what you've got, for somebody you know is capable of cheating? Is that smart?
Learn how to be faithful to the person you commit to. Don't let exes come along and tear apart something you've built with someone new. They sometimes don't really want you, but don't want anybody else to have you either. Some guys hate it when you find someone better than they are. It's about ego!
If you are only using the guy you're with as a place-holder; while you were waiting for your ex to breakup; you're a player.
You're going to break his heart, and karma is going to comeback to get you! The cheater will break your heart again. After destroying what you have! Be that the case, what goes around comes around, and you'd deserved it.
Keep your relationship, and cutoff all contact with your ex.
Don't expect anyone to be faithful to you; if you don't know how to be faithful yourself. The guy you have is trustworthy and has never cheated on you. He has all the good qualities a boyfriend should have.
As I know girls, they like the bad-boys better. The dummies learn from a broken-heart. Then get all damaged and blame guys for being dogs. How about making a bad choice in the first place?
So go get your heart broken again; since you love the other guy more. In spite of knowing he's the worst choice.
Don't keep the guy you have from finding someone more trustworthy; and who doesn't have some other guy on her mind. That's cheating too!
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