A
female
age
51-59,
*ara
writes:hi...i'll try to keep it as brief as possible...4 year live in relationship, he moved out b/c of drug problem in april 08..supposed to be cleaning himself up and we start again in a new apt, new location. we opened the relationship to dating others, but always still seeing each other, supporting each other financially, emotionally, etc. fast forward to november 08 thanksgiving he screws some girl he knew from before...then we get together 2nd week of december. we have an argument through the holidays and don't speak again until Jan 2, when he tells me this chick is now 6 weeks pregnant...she must have gotten knocked up the first time he touched her! i smell a rat, but now he's saying he believes the baby is his and he's going to marry her! although he's now sleeping at her apt every night, he calls me most days and even called to wish me a happy valentine's day and say that he was not spending it with her, but working until 10pm. he sounded tender and sorry for everything...we are incredibly close.though moving on with my life, i do love him and i want to keep the door open for the possibility that this "instant relationship" will fail and he'll find himself a single dad with visitation rights...i want to be there for him and begin anew as we meant to do originally...should i accept that he's gone now, or keep the lines of communication open because we really do love each other? help!
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female
reader, 48years  +, writes (18 February 2009):
 Be glad that you're not the pregnant one... after all, he is supposed to soon be committed to her, yet he was with you!
A
female
reader, MaggieMay123  +, writes (17 February 2009):
FORGET HIM!!!
Honey.. you aren't a doormat are you?
If he loved you he wouldn't have had sex..
If he loved you he would have given up the drugs..
He's a lost cause and there are guys out there who will love you and want to make you happy.. this guy doesn't
These men are hard to find but worth it when found..
Start going out with girlfriends and making new friends..
Take up a new hobby to rid your mind of this guy..
It will hurt but distractions dim the pain until you find one day.. Oh.. its gone!
Good luck!
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A
female
reader, Mrs. Mom +, writes (17 February 2009):
 Accept that he's gone. He sounds like a lot more trouble than he's worth. I hate to think of you sitting and waiting for him to become available again, when he did such a thing to you in the first place. This is life's way of getting you out of a dubious situation. Grab the opportunity offered and say "Thank you."
I know you love him, but free your heart up. You can do much better than this guy.
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