A
male
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I am from the Philippines, and had a girlfriend for the past 1.5 years. Our relationship has been very good.Last July 2010, she left for one middle eastern country to work in one top-notch hotel. Her contract was suppose to be for 2 years.Before she left, we discussed a lot of things. More than anything else, we really promised each other to keep our lines of communications open through texts, chats, emails, and calls. All of these, so that we can keep our relationship strong despite the distance.Unfortunately, after about 3 months, in spite of everything, she fell in love with a Turkish guy who is a few years younger than she is. A few weeks ago, she asked me for a break-up. The reason she gave was she had wanted to focus more on her work rather than on us. (That, of course, was a lie. She really had another BF over there.)I really do not have any idea of the mores and behavior of Turkish men. Here in the Philippines, we men generally have a great deal of respect for committed women. We do not attempt to steal another woman especially if we know she is already married or has a BF. (There are exceptions, of course.)My questions are these: is that the same for Turkish men? Or, would they still venture out to steal a woman they are attracted to even if they knew she was already "owned."My GF is a single mother with two sons. They are not my kids, but I have already accepted her and her sons as part of my life and love.Will a Turkish man take her seriously despite her situation? Will he still have clear-cut intentions of marrying her despite her being a single mother? Or, is he just after her because of sex? (I must admit, my now ex-GF is pretty damn hot!)I know I won't be able to have my ex-GF back. I'm not even entertaining that thought. I'm just worried she is just being taken for a ride by her new found love, but in the end, will just get dumped after he has "enjoyed" the spoils of war.
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 February 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you for your reply. However, let me just clarify certain things which I disagree on.Your reply is based on speculations. There are a lot of "mays" and "may not." That still leaves me in a questioning state because the real reason why I am asking about Turkish men is because I do believe there are fundamental givens in our manner of behaving. I know there are differences between Filipino men and Turkish men, and I'd like to be informed about the latter in particular. (I am a behaviorist and neo-Freudian, and I do adhere to many of the theories of B.F. Skinner and Freud.) Also, I do believe that culture and religion plays an important role in our behaviors. Truth of the fact is, there are big differences between Asians and Europeans (even among Asians there are marked differences already), Filipinos and Turkish. (We already differ in our faiths -- we are Christians, and they are Muslims.) That does not mean one is superior and the other is inferior. However, we are definitely NOT the same, and the exceptions (the minority) DO NOT represent the norm. I have read several articles from books and even the internet about Turkish men. From a general perspective, I can already see there is a big difference between us and them -- how we view life, love, women, sex, marriage, family life, etc. Of course, I have to screen out information from those "in-the-know," from those coming from the "ordinary man on the street."As for the fact about this guy "not being aware" about my now ex-girlfriend's former status, well, I know he WAS aware. My girlfriend's facebook account states it very clearly that she was "in a relationship." My name was even mentioned there, and from her wall posts, we have a lot of sweet exchanges. (This guy was part of my ex-girlfriend's 'friends.')I know I must move on. I am clear on that. As I mentioned in my initial post, I am not expecting my ex back. Still, I would like to know more about Turkish men, and how they look upon single mothers, women in general, Asian women, in particular Filipino women (who are a lot in the middle east!), about interracial marriages, etc.In that regard, I would appreciate answers from those who can really give concrete answers, i.e., those who are Turkish, or those who have lived with Turkish men, or have lived in Turkey.Many thanks though for your reply. More power to you!
A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (18 February 2011):
 Well am sure you would agree that not 100% of philippine men are exactly the same in there morals and the same should be said about turkish men, they are not all the same therefore nobody on this can answer your questions really. He may love her and he may want to take on her two sons, many men out there would be willing to do that, as you have shown you were willing to do that. Culture shouldnt take a part in it really. Just remember you dont even know if this guy was aware that she already had a boyfriend for all you know she could have lied to him aswell and said she was single. I guess the sad truth is you will probably never know. But its obvious you still care for her when you are asking all these questions. You need to move on now and forget about her and her relationships let her make her own mistakes. You get on with your life now and enjoy yourself. Go out with friends and try to get over the heart break. Goodluck my friend.
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