A
male
age
36-40,
*ellow210
writes: i am a 25 yr old male dating this 37 yr old woman with 3 kids this is a long distance relationship it is hard for us to see each other due to financial reasons i really love this woman and i wanna be with her its just everyday her kids be rude and disrespectful towards i cant even hardly enjoy a conversation with her on the phone because of them by the way her kids is 12,10, and 8 on top of that she be having drama,issues, and dilemma every single day she also has alot of health problems she doesnt go get more of her medicine,doesnt go to the hospital when she needs to go and its like i try to suggest things to her and give her advice but its like she has an excuse for everythang and it seems like she wants to sleep all day everyday talking bout shes tired and exhausted even when she just relax at home all day or take a nap all day she still will complain that she is tired and exhausted and she is unemployed right now she lives with with her sister so her and her sister has their cooking days so she doesnt have to cook everyday her kids is spoiled brats like i said i wanna be with her but its like i dont think i can deal wit this anymore. can anyone help with some suggestions/advice? plz
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 September 2010): Taking away from the age difference, and from the distance thing, and taking the children out of the equation. Because those things are facts and cant be changed. You either chose to accept them or not.
Heres my thing. You dont write like a 25 year old. You also seem to put alot of pressure on her. You are not her parent or her spouse. You are not the step father to those children. You have no right to tell her how to parent, tell her what she should do.
A partner is someone who is supportive of their loved one. It is not your job to make her decisions, it is your job to support the decisions she makes. If you dont like the decisions she makes, get out of the relationship.
If I had no job, 3 kids, had to live with my sister, and had health issues, odds are I would be very very depressed. The last thing I need, is the person I care about nagging me too.
This is why I said you dont write like a 25 year old. You dont seem to come across as someone who has been in many adult relationships, you dont seem to get you woman at all.
I wish the both of you the best in you journey together, but honestly, it seems niether of you have your lives together and instead of working on yourself so that you have something to offer a woman, you would rather tell the woman youre with what and how she should be doing.
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