A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: I've been in a long distance relationship..for two years now! My boyfriend's work brings him to my adopted country a couple of times a year. I fly out to see him whenever he is in the same hemisphere. The problem is that he makes no effort to come see me on his own, if his company pays for the trip then he makes it, if not then I don't see him. When we started dating we talked about long term plans and kids and where they should go to school!! Now he seems to take it as a given that things will not work out. All through this he maintains he loves me and doesn't want to lose me. I am going crazy trying to figure out what the hell I should be doing. He's supposed to come to town in the next ten days sometime.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 May 2009): Maybe he hasn't the money?
You need to talk to him about this as obviously you can never get to know each other anywhere near enough to get married etc unless you spend more time together.
He could have misgivings, so bear this in mind and be prepared, but try to keep an open mind.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 May 2009): Maybe its a financial issue since he will only make the effort to see you when the company pays for the trip?
Next time you see him, why not talk to him about it? Ask yourself first how you feel about him, if you see a future with him. Be prepared for the worst and hope for the best. Sometimes a good talk might be the beginning of clearing up underlying issues and problems.
Best of luck.
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