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LDR boyfriend is coming, there will be lots of sex but thats not what I want

Tagged as: Long distance, Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (31 August 2011) 2 Answers - (Newest, 1 September 2011)
A female United States age 41-50, anonymous writes:

Dear Cupid

My bf and myself stay in separate places like 8 hrs drive from each other. He visits me like 2 months once , but lately he is very moody and not talking to me much in phone and is getting very irriated very often even for small things.

Not much is happening in his life and so its not him. I thought it might be me, so tried not to be clingy (i never was in the first place) and not calling him even once a day, stuff like that, but nothing changed.

He said he is gonna visit me next week, i know there is gonna be lot of sex, but im not really sure about this right now. I dont want to meet him just for sex, if he is not opening up even after 2 yeras of dating, i dont feel like sleeping with him. Does everyone feels like this way like me, btw when he visited me previous time, he never really talked other than sex stuff.

Please advice me on this

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A female reader, RedAthena United States +, writes (1 September 2011):

RedAthena agony auntWho said you have to have sex?

You are never obligated to have sex with someone. If he visits, examine the relationship and see if you want to continue. Make it sex free weekend and see where his focus really is? Why have sex if you do not want to?

If all he does is visit you and expect sex, then he is probably using you and the LDR situation keeps it comfortable because he does not have to try very hard to maintain a relationship.

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A female reader, mizz.butterflies United States +, writes (31 August 2011):

mizz.butterflies agony auntbreak up.hes coming only for sex.

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