A
female
age
36-40,
*aysha1
writes: Hi there, bear with me, this is a long one.My boyfriend and I ave been in together for just over 3 months. We have been Long distance for 7 weeks now - i was travelling and now he's travelling (both independant plans we'd organised months before we met). Everything has been wonderful, we have a lot of chemistry and are been deeply in love - i know that i have never felt this way about anyone before and he has told me that he feels the same way. The problem here is that for the last 2 weeks, its been really hard getting into contact with him. The town he's staying at is very small and he has no phone and very limited internet access (internet cafes). The last time we spoke on the phone (2 weeks ago) everything was great and i have no reason to doubt that he still loves me - his friends have been telling me this also, but i'm feeling very lonely and isolated without him.I know that i am completely in love with him, i have never been so happy before and at the same time, i have never felt such an emptiness in my heart as i do when he's not around. I just need a way to make it through this period of limited communication.He sends me an email whenever he can but its not much and its every 3 or 4 days. The last one he said he was thinking of moving overseas for a year or so and that he'd call me when he could find a phone, but that was 4 days ago now. I miss him like crazy and i guess what i'm asking is for advice. I don't want to sound clingy and freak him out - i send him an email every 1-2 days with updates and to tell him i love him and miss him - but its not enough for me. any help would be wonderful!
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female
reader, busy04 +, writes (10 August 2009):
Well I can totally understand how you feel. I've been in a LDR with my boyfriend for the past 3 1/2 years now (we've made it work & it's wonderful:). So I know that it's hard for you, but you can make it. And of course it takes LOTS & LOTS of communication and PATIENCE! Since he has limited ways to contact you maybe you two can come up with some type of plan, like maybe he can buy a phone card & talk to you that way, you know do things like that. And even though he may not be calling or emailing as much as you like: don't think that he's forgotten about or fallen out of love with you, he's just in a complicated state (not having the things he needs to keep in constant contact). Anyone can give you advice on this, but it all goes back to you & your partner. LDR relationships take much work & much compromise just as any other relationship, if not more. So you have to work, you need to talk to him and come to some type of understanding, make some ground rules with each other, i.e "we have to talk to each other at least once or twice a week". It'll work out for the both of you! It takes work to make it work so work it :)
If long distance isn't for you, if it's too much to handle then I suggest you get out of it now, cause LDR are NOT for everybody. But for the ones that it is for: it all comes together in the end!
Hope I helped!
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