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female
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anonymous
writes: I have recently started seeing an ex-boyfriend again who I have been on and off with for 3 years, during which we lived together for one year. I ended the relationship because I had a lot of guy friends and he kept getting really jealous. Now we are getting on great and we have worked through the issue of jealousy but the other reason I ended the relationship (petty as it may sound) is because I am six foot tall and he is almost a head shorter than me, and I feel very self conscious when we are in public together. In all other ways he is exactly what I'm looking for - ambitious, kind, generous and loyal.
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female
reader, nobody +, writes (15 September 2006):
Had to answer when I saw this question - I copied and pasted it and emailed it to my parents. You see, they had exactly the first problem when they first met, Mum dumped Dad because she felt self conscious about the height difference. But obviously that wasnt the end of the story - after a year or so of dating men the same height as her, she decided she had been stupid to throw away an amazing relationship because of something so trivial. They have now been married 31 years and have four children. hope thats encouraging. xxxx
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 September 2006): As the friend Dazzerg refered to, I understand your issue completely. Height is a big deal to me to (I'm about alf a cm off 6') and like Dazzerg said I put it largely down to a subconcious desire to be protected. I never feel as comfortable around shorter men as I do around taller ones (dating or not). I often go as far as to not consider a guys boyfriend potential just because he's to short - and I feel petty and shallow about doing so, but I know from experience that the self-conciousness will eventually drive me to be wanting to get out of the relationship.I can't really suggest anything, but I can at least confirm that you are not the only taller girl to have issues with having men shorter then you.
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A
female
reader, stina  +, writes (15 September 2006):
 Hi Anon,
Your question grabbed my attention because my husband is shorter than me (except I like shorter guys. heh). Listen, don't let it bother you that he is shorter - it really doesn't have anything to do with what kind of person he is, as you already seem to know.
And when it comes to being seen in public together, try to remember that numerous people are always judging others for anything, anyway. I know this isn't exactly a positive (haha) but it really is true.
Try to look at it this way - if someone stares at you because they think your hair looks bad, then you wouldn't give a crap because you like it, right? Same sort of thinking should be applied to you and your boyfriend. Do you understand what I mean?
Bottom line is: don't give a crap about what other people think, because in your heart you know he's the one for you. Be glad that you found someone so great! :)
Take care.
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A
male
reader, Dazzerg  +, writes (15 September 2006):
 You remind me very much of one of my friends who has a big thing about height. I think the height think is to do with a subconscious desire to be protected and in some people its unnerveing if your partner is of lesser stature. I dont know what to suggest because you can barely have him wear stilts. All I can suggest is that just because he is shorter doesnt make him any less of a man.
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A
female
reader, Suzanna +, writes (15 September 2006):
 This should make to no difference to you and your relationship at all. I am sure that your boyfriend is very proud that such a tall girl is interested in him and I bet you his friends are very jealous of him. Get these thoughts out of your head now!
It sounds like you are a great couple, so do not let something silly get in the way!
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