A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I've been in a relationship now for 7 months with my boyfriend. We usually see each other 3 times a week, but lately I've noticed things that are niggling away at me. Firstly in the seven months that we've been together I've only met one of his friends and this is because he shares a house with my boyfriend. Ive seen two other of his friends while we were out bowling, but I was never introduced to them, which leaves me wondering whether he is embarassed by me.I've not met his family, but this is because he has not told his family that he's gay. He on the other hand has met my family. He stayed at my house a few weeks back, but he said hello to my dad and then left. Also, the other week when I went to collect something from my house my boyfriend wouldn't come inside and said he would wait outside, which left me wondering what he has against my family and when my sister attempted to introduce herself he said a quick hi and then turned away, which left me fuming.Also my boyfriend told me two weeks ago that he had no money this month, so I would have to go to his house and watch tv. Then on Saturday I text him about 12pm and I received a text from him at 12:30am sunday morning saying hed been the pictures, paintballing, bowling and gocarting..not bad for someone who has no money. Also, the fact he didnt text back till that time annoyed me also because he had time to go online and chat to his friends and he said he hadnt checked his phone, but he always checks his phone so I dont believe what he says.Then on Sunday I was going out with a friend I havent seen in years so I had to cancel our normal night and then I told him I might not be able to make our tuesday night either but wasnt sure yet, he replied back rather chirpily oh no problem I can go bowling so dont mind not seeing you. This too annoyed me as it would have been nice for him to at least say oh but I wanted to see you tuesday, but no and he doesnt quite understand why im annoyed and being funny.I havent said any of this stuff to him as I dont know if its just me being over sensitive or whether there really is a problem here..anyone have any advice?sorry this was so long
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (8 May 2007): Him not introducing you to his family or friends and not wanting to know your family could be because he is nervous about it, even if they know he is gay.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (7 May 2007): His friends do know that he is gay, but for some reason he has chosen not to introduce me. Its not that it particularly bothers me that I havent met his friends, its more that when we were bowling and his friends were there it would have been nice to even introduce me, but nothing, which makes me paranoid that maybe he is embarassed by me
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 May 2007): he probably did not introduce you to his family yet because he is still 'in the closet' about it. His friends on the other hand should have already known that he was gay, i guess. I had the same type of problem, in that I am white and my boyfriend is black, he did not want to carry me home at first because his parents were, well i guess ...... hoping that he would take an African-American girl. At first it was kinda uncomfortable, but now, everything is good.
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A
female
reader, in my opinion +, writes (7 May 2007):
 i think maybe he has some issues, you should try talking to him to resolve some of the problems or concerns you have. as i always tell my friends, for a relationship to be a good working one you need to be honest from the start. if he doesn't like what you have to say then maybe you should go your seperate ways and for you to find someone who is interested in every aspect of your life.
good luck
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 May 2007): honestly i haven't read all the details of this question but i feel i don't need to. as soon as i read, "I've never met his family or many of his friends, do you think he's embarrassed by me?" i wanted to respond..no but he probably is embarassed of his family. then, i learned that this is a gay relationship. probably he and his family/friends haven't come to terms with this situation. he may not feel comfortable in this identity yet.
you would know better than me. i feel like this would be my response to any gay relationship troubles, which probalby makes this unhelpful. hopefully it shed some light though.
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