| A
female
,
*vanna22
writes: Okay, I'm so fraid that the same thing is gonna happend again. I'm so not exited about this date. Ever since I started working at Hollister Co, guys I worked with stared asking me on dates. There's this one black guy I rejected because he was planning on moving out together the first day we met. Then this guy John who was always telling people how hot and sexy he thought I was and that he was into me. Well this guy quit and told me that even thought we weren't gonna be working together anymore, "he's not gonna let anyone as cute as me get away that easily". Well I thought he was gonna call me and ask me out or something but NOTHING. He never texted back, never called. And I wonder why?!?! I thought he liked me! i'm very confused. Then this guy who was my bf for about two weeks. After I broke up with him for not answering my phone calls and texts for five days, he told people that he wasn't emotionally attracted to me and that I was needy. Then this guy Aaron who asked me out on a date for this weekend. I hope he calls tomorrow. Then my ex bf who I really liked and wanted to get back with him but he didn't cuz he is in school in Ohio and i was in new jersey, but then he started trying to hang out with one of my good friends after he got mad at me for trying to make him jealuos by saying something stupid. He told me he erased her number from his phone list and that he will NEVER hang with her without me and that he was NOT into her. Well now he calls her every time he's home from school. Then my bf of 3 years and 4 months who is very abusive and treats me like shi* but I still feel too connected to him to leave him but I also feel guilty for cheating on him ALL the time. It's hard not to when u have guys who actually treat me right. Well now, this date! This black guy who is very good looking he actually looks like a model, well he asked me out on a date and I feel like i'm always doing something wrong with every guy I go on a date with and that's why they don't want to commit to me and get uninterested. I don't know what to do because there's this one part of me that's telling me that this guy might be the right one for me but then there's this other part of me who feels sooo unexited because I feel like it's the same story as always and that guys are ALL the same. I'm very confused right now. Am I doing something wrong? Why do guys seem to be so interested at first and then after a few dates they tell me that they don't want to be in a relationship? Should I just tell this guy NO?? Or should I give it a try? Or should I stay with my bf of 3 years and 4 months and be faithful to him? This guy is black and I've never dated a black guy before so I thought it would be good to try for a change. Maybe white preppy guysaren't for me? Maybe black preppy guys are!Please advice. Should I go on a date with this guy?
View related questions:
broke up, my ex, text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Yos  +, writes (9 December 2006):
 "Am I doing something wrong? Why do guys seem to be so interested at first and then after a few dates they tell me that they don't want to be in a relationship?"
Hard to answer. You don't say if you are sleeping with them or not. if you are I'd suggest waiting on that. You'll find men tend to stick around longer if you get to know them (and they get to know you) better before you have sex.
And I'd agree with the other response, it sounds very much like you should leave your boyfriend. His treating you badly is not healthy for your self esteem or your life in general.
A
female
reader, Ivanna22 +, writes (9 December 2006):
Ivanna22 is verified as being by the original poster of the question idk, I guess i'm kind of a player haha. I love having a lot of guys calling me and complementing me haha. Don't hate.
...............................
A
female
reader, sashajones +, writes (3 December 2006):
Black guys usually not always date outside their race because it is easier for them to be sorry and unfaithful. Just be careful. He knows a sista will not put up with his crap. On the other hand he could be a good guy. Just make sure he is not using your car, always broke asking you for money, not wanting to be committed but want to have sex with you.
...............................
A
female
reader, pica +, writes (3 December 2006):
You mean he doesn't talk or act like _you_ expect a black guy to do. That reveals your expectations, not his. But to say "good to try for a change" .. breathtaking.
And really, what is with all these guys and the background boyfriend? You have a boyfriend, plus you meet guys and go out with them, they don't call back. You can work that out, surely.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 December 2006): Maybe they like you at first, then they spend time with you...
...............................
A
female
reader, Ivanna22 +, writes (3 December 2006):
Ivanna22 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThis guy doesn't talk or act like he's black thought. He's preppy and lives in a rich area.
...............................
A
female
reader, Ivanna22 +, writes (3 December 2006):
Ivanna22 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks! yeah I thinhk you're right. What have I got to loose? I am gonna give it a try. I hope it works out this time thought. The manager at Abercrombie also asked me out. Guys seem to come and go for no reason. The guy that asked me out on a double date for this weekend never called me back. Guys are very strange.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 December 2006): males are strange so don't always reply to txts etc i think you should give this bloke a try blokes who are black are not any different to boys that are white though i have heard that they can be more romantic so go for it whta have you really go to loose just be open and bubbly laugh at any jokes and evn try copying his movemetns and remember never talk to him without looking at him he will think that oyu don't want him if you feel nervous try cracking a few jokes to make him laugh good luck!!!
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 December 2006): males are strange so don't always reply to txts etc i think you should give this bloke a try blokes who are black are not any different to boys that are white though i have heard that they can be more romantic so go for it whta have you really go to loose just be open and bubbly laugh at any jokes and evn try copying his movemetns and remember never talk to him without looking at him he will think that oyu don't want him if you feel nervous try cracking a few jokes to make him laugh good luck!!!
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 December 2006): Sort out the boyfriend situation before you start thinking about dating other guys, be they white, black, blue or green.
...............................
|
