A
female
age
51-59,
*edinSD
writes:I have serious issues. I'm in my late 30's I've been married 2 years, been with my husbad for 7 total. We don't have any kids (thank God!). Before him I was in two consecutive 3 year relationships. I broke up with both of them. In each of those relationships I just stopped loving the guy. I got bored and moved on. I thought my husband was different. I waited 5 years before marrying him and was so happy. Shortly after we got married I was pretty convinced that he was cheating on me with this woman he knew before we even started dating. She would text him all the time and would come over and "hang out" with him while I worked a second job at night. Then he started to lie to me about seeing her when I asked him to stop. I asked him to break it off, but he still stayed in contact with her. She just recently moved across country so I should be happy right? No. When all that happened something just clicked in me. I didn't feel the same about my husband anymore. I started hanging out with one of our guy friends whom we've known for about 3 years. I really like this guy now. I'm attracted to him and pretty much can't stop thinking about him, although I have no clue how he feels about me. We haven't crossed any lines and we don't talk about personal things at all. We're just really friendly and we do flirt, but I feel like I want more and I know that if I were single this guy and I would hook up. I've recently lied to my husband twice in order to see this guy. I'm lying just to hang out with him!! I just don't know what to do. I feel like a horrible person.
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female
reader, hockeyluvr5 +, writes (30 July 2009):
 Hmmm, well that's not good at all.
If I were you, I'd file for divorce.
And just stick with dating guys, not so forth the marraige.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 July 2009): You need to decide what you want... either divorce your husband, or re-write the rules of your marriage to allow each of you discrete relationships so that your needs are met.If you decide that you want out of this marriage, then you may want to avoid meeting your next victim until you can work on yourself enough to know why your seven year itch comes 4 years too early...
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A
female
reader, Renee okc +, writes (30 July 2009):
You no what I will be the one to say you are full of crap, The bottom line is you just want to hang out and be with whomever you feel is for you at the time. I can understand you thought your husband was cheating with this women but that is no excuse to go out and do the same thing if you know what your problem is and this is your pattern, then tell your husband it is time for you to move on because he bores you now (are you serious). You have commitment issues and your hubby is just along for the ride you need to fess up to how you really feel that way if he wants to move on he can.
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A
female
reader, boo22  +, writes (30 July 2009):
 Hi there, you must be in bits over all this. I have to say though that running into the arms of the next guy who you fancy is not the answer to anything. Sounds like you've just gone off your husband as well. Not to worry, there's no kids involved. Don't get so involved with guys, maybe you're just not the commitment type.
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A
female
reader, RedinSD +, writes (30 July 2009):
RedinSD is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWell, she would text him multiple times a day and I saw a text from her, on his work phone no less, that said "Let's get naked and Fxxx! That doesn't make me think they were just friends. He created this huge lie to go see her at her home the same day he got that text.
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A
female
reader, hockeyluvr5 +, writes (30 July 2009):
Don't lie to your husband.
That's not the key to anything.
Just be straight up honest with him.
But you should not have told him to stop talking to that lady, they're just friends and you have to respect that.
I know it might seem hard but it's life and you dont get everything exactly how you had planned.
He has/had every right to hang out with her as you do with the guy you like now.
Or just file for divorce.
It would cause you less stress and that way if you and that guy really like eachother. you could have the opportunity to be together.
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