A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:i just recently realised that i'm bi and me (16) and this guy in another state(14) REALLY like each other and he wants me to be his boyfriend.I really don't know what to do because i've never done the whole long distance thing or the whole boyfriend thing. My main gripe/concern is that if i say yes i may miss out on some opportunites that are closer to home, but even saying that i feel horrible 'cause it makes my intentions seem like i'm favouring lust over love!I really don't know what i should do. any help would be greatly appreciated.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (16 December 2007): hi im 15 and gay if you realy like the other guy then go for it but if you want to try new things with new people keep it a open relationship
A
male
reader, Stupid Lullabies  +, writes (13 December 2007):
I think this all comes down to how well you know the guy. Long distance relationships in my experience only survive when the people involved have been together for a few years prior to being split up, often they were friends before they got together, and when the separation is temporal, ie you know when you can be together even if it a year, two years away. If that applies to you then there's a good chance a long distance relationship can work. I'm not going to give lboy grief, his opinion is as valid as anyone's but I do not recommend an open relationship. In my experience these only lead to feelings of jealousy, resentment, insufficiency and depression for one or even both of the people in the relationship. I don't see how this will be anything but compounded by the distance between you, the simpler things are the better.
The truth is, if he is really worth it, and he feels the same way about you, you can make it work if you want to. But it will take an effort, just like any relationship worth having.
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A
male
reader, lboy +, writes (10 December 2007):
 dear reader,
this answer may get me alot of grief from other aunts but i think u shud say yes to the long distance but ask for it to be an open relationship. i find that is the best way to deal with a long distance relationship, that way if u do fall in love with him u can always decide to make things more serious but if not then u haven't lost any chances.
hope this helps.
good luck
lboy
xxx
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A
female
reader, angelblueeyes +, writes (10 December 2007):
 Hi,
I am a person that does not really believe that long distance relationships can work..been there and it didnt!
Only you can answer that question really, do you truely feel for this guy? what would you do if you were 'with' this guy and you met someone else closer to home that you thought was kinda nice do you think that you could resist the sexual side of things?
It is no good me telling you what i think you should do, only you can do that but i wish you luck with it all and i hope everything works out for you!
Lu x
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