| A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: My ex broke up with me! He just did! I feel awful!!! I'm in such pain!!!!!!!HE seems so conten with the decision... it's just we'd had issues a lot of issues because he couldn't trust me because of my past and because I lied, so that made us fight sometimes and lately he'd argue with me and as it was just too much I'd self harm, I'd hit myself in the head or pull my hair, etc... and he just thought that everything that came out of my mouth was nagging...This would've been a good relationship if only he'd gotten over my past and wasn't so restrictive as to what I could do or not do to earn his trust back.He said that lately he just wasn't enjoying the relationship anymore, but he wanted it to work so much. Tha he loves me so much, but for his own mental sanity and happiness, he rathers be alone than with a self harmer and nagging person like me.I feel like crap rithg now! This was unexpected. I feel worthless, I've had self esteem issues for a long time, I was feeling very weak, and now I received this e-mail and it's over... I have no friends - I lost them all to him, and well I can't go back to them because some of them moved to other cities and others we just grew apart and developed different interests.I don't know what to do. I feel unloveable and unable to love again. He wanted to marry me... and now he realized he's better off alone... and he'll find someone else soon I'm sure and has a wonderful group of friends.I feel damn bad!!!! This was my first boyfriend and love.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, scrazy  +, writes (15 June 2008):
 First of all: GET HELP.
And I mean, mental help, self harm is serious (I'm a cutter, I know what I'm talking about) and obviously, that is one of the reasons you and your boyfriend didn't work out.
However, I wouldn't recommend you being in a relationship anyways. It's hard for your bf or gf to be able to accept that and understand what you're going through.
Regardless, you'll be fine without him. You can make other friends and move on with your life - it was his decision to break up with you and there's nothing you can do now except to take care of yourself.
I'm sorry if I sound a little harsh, but I'm more concerned about your self-harm issues then your boyfriends. Message me if you ever need to talk.
xo
scrazy.
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