A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:I'm 15, and I have a huge grudge holding problem. I can't help it! I know its wrong and immature, but once i get them, they never go away. I've been told countless times just to let it go but I can't. I feel like I'm "punishing" them for what they did. Almost like if i let it go, they win or I'll be a pushover. How can I get rid of a grudge? Thanks!Oh and BTW, please don't lecture me on why I shouldn't hold grudges. I know I shouldn't but they form anyway! I have no idea why.
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reader, anonymous, writes (3 August 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks!! sorry I responded late I didn't have access to a computer. I worked things out the next day. :)
A
female
reader, chickpea2011 +, writes (30 July 2011):
 Hi,I am just like you... I know its wrong, immature, but that's our personality. Some people handles bad situations well, some, like us just go nuts... What could be a big deal for us, might mean nothing to them. Everybody have different opinions, different reactions, different levels of integiry and so on...Basically, we are more sensitive than others. We are very passionate about everything. We have strong feelings and opinions about things, etc...Don't change who you are. I am much older than you, and I've learned to be more flexible and control my feelings. Why? Because you just have to. Its part of life, even though you are right about something or somebody, you need to let the other win, just for the sake of it, doesn't mean they win, they're right, but its just part of life. Sometimes life is unfair, being older than you, I can tell that I have seem my share of injustice, but you have to let go, like your friends said, just for your own sanity and your own health. Through out my life, I was very strong about my believes, opinions, but trying to prove I was right, the only thing I got is bitterness, anger, and unfortunatly that led to health issues.. So, save yourself while you are young and try to adjust with the other people, by being more flexible. Its difficult, but push yourself everyday!!! I believe you, you are right, but no matter what the issues are, holding grudge will only make you a bad, ugly, bitter, angry, sad person... Holding grudge eats you inside, eat all the good in you, so push yourself not to hold grudges! Learn to forgive! Not because the other people deserve your forgiveness, but because you deserve ... Do it for you...Good luck!
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