A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I found some old messages from my bfs ex to him (from before him and I even went out), and they were from my bf saying things like "you look so good naked", "can you wear that tiny thong again" and "i love waking up to you naked". I know it's in the past and it was before I even existed to him, but it still makes me feel very weird and I suddenly feel like whenever he says those things to me, it doesn't mean a lot anymore. It also makes me feel a bit sick. Please help - I can't stop thinking about it. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, RedAthena  +, writes (18 August 2011):
 You kind of got what you deserved poking around where you did not belong.
For the record-it is not unusual or "special" that man says he likes to see his lady naked, sleep with her naked or wear something that turns him on. He probably told her a LOT of things that were similiar to what he says to you.
That does not mean you are "less than" anyone else. The only one sabotauging the relationship is you.
A
female
reader, Vanessa_Twinkle  +, writes (18 August 2011):
Hey,
i understand that must´ve been a really bad thing to read and that when he says those things to you, you dont really feel as special cos he´s said them to her, but what you got to think is that you have him now, not his ex. And he picked you so he must love you not anyone else. Just let go of those feelings it might be hard at first but then you´ll be truly happy and you can then continue with the relationship just how it was before you read those things.
She´s not important to him anymore and she shouldnt be to you either, just let go.
You´ll manage dont worry :)
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A
female
reader, angelDlite +, writes (18 August 2011):
 just stop thinking about it. when you find yourself starting to think about it just find something else to do, anything that engages your brain - watch a film, do some puzzles, play a video game. you will soon get out the habit of thinking about this. wherever you found these messages - don't snoop there again. just accept that he has an ex who he had sex with and all the usual boyfriend/girlfriend stuff. you must have KNOWN this already? i guess its shocking to see their words in black and white but you will feel better after the initial OMG has worn off - and it will, don't worry
x
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