A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:ok well i hav been goin out w/ ths guy for like 4 weeks, and my ex bf had had some thngs tht weve done. but durin christmas break me and my ex had been txtin bout sex w/ each other and my mom read my txts. she was mad so me and my ex decided to stop. but later on after the break he kept smiling and he asked me if he we could do thngs... i didnt want to do it but then i just basically had oral sex w/ him. nw i dnt kno if i should tell my bf i feel really bad for cheatin on him but nw every1 basically knows in our grade. then hes started goin out w/ ths grl but he keeps smilin at me and like kickin me and slappin on my bak, his friend tld me tht he tld him tht he likes me but he doesnt want to tell his gf... should i believe him? am i still a virgin even though i basically had oral sex? should i tell my bf? wat should i do?
View related questions:
christmas, my ex, oral sex, still a virgin Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 February 2009): In my own personal opinion yes you have loads to feel guilty about, and If you justify your actions by saying something silly like: “you never discussed that you were going to see only each other:” that’s bull, as soon as you have a BF as soon as I guy asks you if you want to be his girlfriend and you go of and do something with another guy then you cheated and did something wrong, I agree you don’t have to tell him, but dear kids don’t keep secrets, everyone in your standard knows about this already, how long do you think its gona take for him to find out, and when he does, you will look like just another young slut to him, who did things with another guy and carried on as though nothing happened, he will think things like this guy wasn’t the one and only guy you cheated on him with, so I will say tell him take him to a place where you can speak privately and you can really explain to him how bad you feel about what happened, explain how it made you feel. You are a young woman, and if you tell the truth now, it doesn’t matter if he drops you afterwards or not, but you would be able to look at yourself in the mirror and say I am a honest girl, honest with myself and those around me. That’s the best quality you can have, and if anyone tells you its better to go against what you believe don’t do it, you are young got carried away and made a mistake, but use this as a learning curve, you know that your ex is just being a silly boy who doesn’t want you for anything more than sex… yea you gave him oral but you still have something else he wants, your virginity!!! Stay away from him and tell your BF this will only make you stronger and wiser. You will meet hundreds of men who will do the same thing, you will be in millions of situations where you are involved but guys still wanna have sex with you, but if you use this experience positively you can control the outcome of those situations so much better, coz you experienced it. Your youth is the foundation of what you will be like when you are an adult is shows how you will carry yourself, would you like it if a guy told you hey you are my girlfriend but im sleeping with the whole town behind your back… coz um we never discussed us only seeing each other LOL you know its stupid so don’t lie. Good luck and DC is a great site for anyone with questions, perhaps your experience, would give you the opportunity to help other young girls like you, remember something positive can come from this mistake you made but the choice is yours.Girly
A
male
reader, lovelynightmare +, writes (20 February 2009):
 Relationships are all about honesty, pure and simple.If you want to be truly honest, drop the bomb and tell your boyfriend the truth with a sincere apology. Your conscience will be clean, and I can't tell you his reaction, but imagine what it could be if you aren't the one telling him.Also, oral sex IS sex.BTW anonymous, it goes without saying that a couple who dates together only sees each other, especially in the US.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 February 2009): If your ex boyfriend has a new girlfriend and is still flirting with you, then you should need no further explanation on what kind of guy he is - NOT WORTH IT. As far as your new boyfriend goes, if you never discussed that you were going to see only each other, then there is no need to tell him or feel guilty about your choices. I personaly think you only let yourself down by choosing to perfom oral sex on a guy that clearly does not care where or who he is getting it from. If you have given your new boyfriend the indication that he is the only one you are seeing, then he has the right to know what you did so that he can choose to have sex with other people too or else find somebody who is willing to be loyal to him depending on his own vaules. He will probably break up with you, but if you don't tell him then you are no better then your ex boyfriend who is still flirting with you. I know you are young and everybody makes mistakes, but any kind of sexual behavior is adult behavior and it comes with adult responsibility.
...............................
|
