A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Lately, I've been losing heart.I would like to have a boyfriend but I'm feeling discouraged. I've been in love before but no one has ever reciprocated my feelings.I've dated guys but never been sexually active... I don't know that I'm saving sex for marriage, per se, but I certainly wouldn't have sex with just anyone. I often feel tense feel like I'm just going to explode and I sense I have sexual needs, but I've stood my ground al these years. I would like to experience sex with a man but I don't want to sleep with someone who's gonna throw me away like garbage the next day. I want a guy who will love me and take me seriously as a girlfriend. I don't wanna be used and then dumped. That would be so humiliating and degrading.I've been feeling depressed lately becuase I'm beginning to think that there's something profoundly and irreversibly wrong with me, and that I'll never find love because of it. I'm not sure what's wrong with me. I'm scared that perhaps my soul is deformed and twisted, or perhaps I just don't have a soul or something. There's a reason I don't seem to click with anyone, and I'm scared that I have some innate, irreversible defect. I can understand that not EVERY man I love is gonna reciprocate my feelings, I know I can't have a whole handful. I'm just frustrated because everyone else seems to have found their someone, and with the billions of humans in the world... you'd think there would be that one perfect one. I look at my friends, most of whom have boyfriends or girlfriends, and think, "Why haven't the fireworks started to pop for me?" I'm beginning to think that it's delusional of me to have hoped for a boyfriend... that there's something wrong with me and that no one will ever be attracted to me. What's wrong with me? What do you do when you're losing heart?
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reader, anonymous, writes (14 March 2010): There is nothing wrong with you, you just got to wait for the right guy. It may take a while but i should all work out. And when you DO find that someone, you will be glad you waited for the right guy.
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