A
female
age
36-40,
*shan05
writes:i have been going out with this guy for 4 months now, and things were going on well with us, we do everything lovers do, but yet he calls me his best friend and says am just a friend, that kinda pisses me off though, but i still keep up. weeks later he started avoiding me, and when i ask, he says he was busy. so at a point we got into a verbal fight and then i stopped talking to him only to realise that am in love with him now. i couldn't help it, and i never helped it, but it happened when we were fighting and i missed him so well. then when i call his phone, he refuses to pick u. he never calls me back. rather he switches off his phone. when i comfront him, he embarrasses me in public, and then he refused me to touch him. but we made love the night before this whole incident. what do i do? i love him.
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female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (25 March 2008):
 If you're in love with him, you're in love with a man who doesn't love you back. He's already demonstrated that by referring to you as a mere friend, rather than girlfriend. He may have been interested in you for sex, but he clearly is not interested in a real romantic relationship with you. You're going to have to let him go. My guess is that you're really in love with the idea of a relationship, rather than the man himself.
I'm sorry to agree with the other posters that you need to move on. Spending one more minute worrying about him is wasting precious time where you could be out there meeting people, spending time with friends, and living with joy, rather than moping over a demonstrably unavailable man.
All the best.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (25 March 2008): I agree.
You're not his GF, you're a sex toy for him. Continuing to sleep with him won't bring you any closer to being his GF either.
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A
female
reader, thatgothgirl20 +, writes (25 March 2008):
 Ever heard of that song by Chris Rock "No Sex in the Champagne Room?" There's a lyric or stanza where he says, "If you've been going out with a guy and you have not met his real friends/family, I repeat you are NOT his gf. I repeat you are NOT his gf."
You are not his gf. He was just using you. He is a jerk, even though you love him.
I would advise you to move on.
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