A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:I have had a relationship with someone for over 2 years now. I knew it was casual from the start and we dont live together. I asked him from the begining to be always honest with me if he did go with someone else. I have just found out now from him that he has been with others and didnt tell me. I dont know why he did this as he said he would be honest. I have confined the relationship to friends only now, but i hurt so much for his deceit. I really want to still be with him but i can not beleive what he says now. What do i do? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 July 2008): sorry hunny, but his man is using you :-( If you want a relationship, you need to cut your losses and him. Having him around, even if only on the phone or by email, will keep YOU stuck and you won't find the love you want and deserve..don't EVER let a man treat you this way again. If you let them they will, because if you don't respect yourself, they won't respect you either.
I'm sorry you are hurting. Hugs
A
male
reader, Collaroy  +, writes (3 July 2008):
 Hi,
I guess that he probably didnt tell you because he thought you were probably more into him than he was into you.
I would put money on that it was his idea for the relationship to be "casual" and that you agreed so you wouldnt lose him , even if you do try and convince yourself that it was a "mutual" decison, I still bet that it was his idea.
Look, he is playing the field and he had you on tap, sorry to be so blunt, but that is the reality of the situation. If you want a permanent relationship and by the sounds of it you do, then you will get over him and you will meet someone else. Next time tell them you want a one on one relationship, often guys will say lets just take it easy to start with , and that's fine, but this rubbish about the relationship being casual is nothing but an excuse to have a girl as backup when he cant pickup.
sorry, and good luck.
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