A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi im really confused. The guy i like is generally a bit shy round me. Well when i say shy, people have said he is. We dont talk much however sometimes he will just talk to me normally othertimes he wont. For example if we go out with friends he will mainly just talk to them, and hes fine, confident but me? nope nothing. Yet if we're left alone he still doesnt talk to me much.Thing is thats got to me is me him and two others than go out together were all messing around. I guess you could take it as just all flirting with each other. She messed round with him so he did with her. But when me and her bf started messing around this guy said "cummon is they;re doing that we are!" And she found that weird, immedately thinking he was jealous.Everyone was positive he liked me but was to shy to even show it. (a lot has happened in the past). However last time we went out things went a bit to far. The minute she shows him attention he goes straight to her. I know shes only trying to liven him up but shes manging to do it but hes only doing it with her. But this time he was flirting with her as if he wanted her. He knows she has no itnerest in him and her n her bf are engaged. her bf knows its only for fun as he would do the same with me. But even this time when me and him were left alone he was more bothered about them coming back. He was guttered when they left. And he made every oppertunity to speak to her. He knows she dont want him or anything and its only fun. but im failing to believe that. Was he only doing it for fun? They dont speak apart from when we all go out however that night i really felt like i shouldnt be there. Im not as lively as her, i cant flirt with guys and when i do try and mess round or talk to him i get nothing back. He seems more bothered about them. I cant talk to him about it because as i say he wont talk. But i need someones advice. I cant get over him, everyone can see theres more to it than this but im loosing hope. I dont even see how i can build on a friendship with him when this happens. Everything was excellent until that one night. Pleae help
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female
reader, BunnyTee +, writes (12 May 2010):
 Honestly, this sounds like one big mess. There are FAR too many she's, he's, and whomever else's involved here. Get outta the weeds, sweetie. Just you and him one-on-one and THEN figure out who's doing what to whom. Until you clean up the mess, you have NO hope of figuring this out. Life isn't meant to be a soap opera so don't live it like one!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 May 2010): If he really wants you, he'll get you. If he really is 'in' for you, he'll not just be up for small talks. He should be man enough to carry a conversation which has sense and make great effort to make things interesting for the both of you. I may not be some 'highly paid counselor' or what so ever but it doesn't need much of thingking to say that 'he's just not that in to you'. You deserve someone better. Diss him and focus on someone who will give you the attention and love that you need. You may just be infatuated with that guy anyway. Why would even think of going out with a guy who digs engaged woman!? I know that attraction is normal and thinking that it's love is a common story but always remember that don't push yourself to hard. Others may think that he likes you but to be honest, I don't think that he does. To be sure, why not try telling him what you really feel. It's really the only way you can be sure. Whatever his answer will be, accept it. If he likes you, good for you. If he don't, move on.
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