A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:ok this is a sex question and all advice is nice.... so the other nite my fiance and i was in bed of course having sex and i played in his anal area and he was so turned on. i liked it, it turned me on but my question is, is that something that turns him on or is it something more??? how do i go about all this honestly either way its really fine with me but how do i find out?? what do you all think??
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male
reader, daletom +, writes (1 September 2009):
Probably the majority of both men and women get pleasure from gentle stimulation around the anal opening when they are sexually aroused. And . . . very few will actually admit it or discuss it. There is a LOT of psychology, and millenia of social conditioning, involved here.
This is a situation where you will probably have to "read" each other by actions and responses. It's quite likely that what works, or is permitted, on one occasion will be rejected at another time. If he can learn to accept the pleasure, and you can learn to read his responses, and you develop the right touch, there will be occasions when you can really enhance the sensations of his orgasm.
Cleanliness is extremely important, and paying attention to where the fingers go after playing in that area. (The safest place for them to go is to a soap-and-water washing.) Immediately after a good bath or shower washing of the anal area you can use the lips and tongue to stimulate it - which can be mind-blowing!
I have been with my wife for over 35 years now. She has never asked for anal stimulation, and certainly never said that she enjoys it. But occasionally when her thighs are wrapped around my ears, she will pull her legs WAY back and rock her pelvis upward. This is her way of saying that I should start at her clit - move across the lips and slit - across her perineum - and keep going . . .
A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 September 2009): You'll have to figure out if he likes the action or the idea of it. That is, he might be turned on just by the idea of you touching him there -- nasty can be a great turn on. If that's all it is, great, and don't go any farther. He might not want penetration. You'll have to feel that one out (sorry ;))
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