A
male
age
36-40,
*iles11687
writes:I have been dating my girlfriend for about a year and a half. It started out great. But recently I have been wondering more and more about how long we will last. I see all of her faults no matter how hard I try to ignore them. I find myself wishing she was more attractive or more aware, etc. I know I am too critical and "picky" but I just cant help it. She is so sweet and nice to me and does many things for me. She loves me so much and wants to be with me forever. She is a great person and there are no reasons for me to break up with her. I just want to be able to feel about her the way she does toward me. I don't want to break up with her, but I wonder if I should. She is not unattractive or dumb, I just want more I guess. And this makes me feel bad because I am not as attractive as I want her to be. ...I guess I don't think I deserve better or that I could get better, I just can't be happy. Maybe that's who I am? I just don't know what to do or think. Is this relationship going nowhere (because of me) or will it get better? I want her to have someone to feel about her the way she does me and I really want to be that person,but I don't know if I can be. I guess I should mention that this is my first serious relationship and I am 21. So I don't know what it is supposed to feel like. It is frustrating because while I do love her, I don't feel I love her enough, or at least am not happy enough. Why cant I just be happy? She really is great! Sometimes I wonder if she looked perfect if I wouldn't feel this way? Basically I am not as happy as I want to be/think I should be. I live with her and have for more than a year. I think that was dumb to move in so soon. I feel my attraction is wearing down. Any advice would be greatly appreiciated.Thanks,Miles Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Your friend  +, writes (26 June 2009):
 You haven't had much experience and seem restless as if you are missing out on something even if you don't know what it is. She sounds absolutely wonderful but if you are becoming increasingly restless and it is getting worse and you stay then you may end up with a bad relationship because it is sometimes easier to break up and move out then talk about it and leaving amicably. Unfortunately as is often the case you could leave, experience other women and wonder for the rest of your life why in the hell you left her...but you wouldn't know that until after you left her.
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