A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:So, I met this married man one night out at a place I always go and hang out. I had seen him maybe twice before with a girl, but he never wore a ring. This is a place where everyone knows each other and if you ever need to scoop on anyone, all you have to do is ask. One night I started talking to this guy after I had spent a while just staring. We talked about a bunch of things, where I lived, what I do, why I moved here, etc, it just seemed natural. Later, I asked one of the girls I know that works there what his name was, because I couldn't remember, and she told me he was married, so I decided I would just leave that alone because I didn't think he would be back out there again.I was wrong. The next week, he came in on a tournament night and ironically enough, we needed someone to sub for us. I asked him and he said yes, and it was harmless flirting all night, but he left rather early. He did take my number and give me his in case we needed someone to fill in again.The next week, we needed him again and I asked if he could join. He said no, but he would be out that weekend. I worked all weekend and when I got off work one night, we played a couple games until about 4 am. He then came home with me. I was just going to let him sleep on my couch so he wouldn't have to drive all the way home with a little buzz. He layed in bed with me, and nothing happened, we just talked. I decided to ask because it was killing me, and he told me he was married, but he was unhappy. He has no kids, and no intention of having kids for a while. He gave me reasons that I would might want to get out of a relationship for as well, but I told myself not to believe him and not to get involved.I had to work the next morning so we parted ways. The next night, he came to my work again, with a friend this time, so I didn't expect anything. He left, but told me he might come back. I told myself yeah right, that's done, whatever. He came back, and sat there and waited for me until I got off of work at around 3 am. We went out to eat and then he came home with me again. Nothing happened between us again, and I was okay with that, I just enjoyed his company and his down to earth personality. He finally leaned in to kiss me, and it made me a little weak, but I knew he was going to leave that day and go back to his wife..I don't know what to do. I keep telling myself to get out, and to not get attached, but it seems to be rather hard. Do I believe this man? Do I wait? Do I leave? Someone help.
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 March 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI just want to say, that many of you will not have the same outcome, but I won, and I DID NOT break up their marriage so don't call me a homewrecker.
And by the way, not all people are the same, so when someone posts something, maybe you should ask questions deeper into the subject, not just knock them down right off the bat. But, I wish everyone a good time and hope you all find what you're looking for! "]
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 February 2011): You're young and if you want to experience that kind of heartbreak, it's your choice, you don't really need anyone's permission. By my own personal experience? I met a man, we dated for a year, before he confessed to being married and unhappy. It took me two weeks to process, and decide if I should wait it out, continue with the relationship or walk away. I walked away. I don't regret meeting him and falling in love, but I am alot more cautious when it comes love. Just know that he will never be trustworthy, reliable, and completely yours, if that is important to you.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 February 2011): this married man is "grooming" you.
the little lies about his wife problems
the little friendship test
the easy does it , good guy
nice feel, nice words
slowly breaking through your defences
getting to gain your trust a bit.
gives the image of a good guy, not understood by his wife. lets you know that he cares for you. wont lie to you.
see you see a pattern forming.
bottom line he is grooming you for sex. either you take a stand for yourself and decide firmly not to mess with married man, or you can become his mistress, believe the worse of his wife. and get suckered into an illicit relationship.
you are halfway there already.
why not check out his story. phone his wife and ask her whether there will be a problems if you sleep with her hb. if she agrees, then you know they are finished. if not, then you know more sh!t to come your way.
Hun, dont fall into the married mans trap. have some self respect and value yourself. go have fun with single men. men who dont cheat on their wives.
has this married man told his wife he is almost out of the door, that he is looking for free sex elsewhere?? will be news to her.
LoveGirl
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 February 2011): I would walk away from this now. I have being there and beleive me it is really hard to have this kind of a relationship. The more your feelings come into this the harder it is to walk away. You become paranoid when he is not with you and with his wife. You sit wondering what they are doing, does he say and do the same things with his wife as he does with you.
Nearly all married men say they are not happy with their wives, most of the time they are just stuck in a rut. You have to remember when he leaves you where he is going back to and who with. Stop letting him into your bed and stay away from him. You are the one that will get hurt in the end. He will promise you he will leave her and make you feel special. Even if she he does leave her then mostly they end up back with them. There are plenty of single guys out there with no baggage and that is what you should be looking for.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 February 2011): Since you live in a place where everyone knows about one another, do you want to be known as the town homewrecker? It's a harsh term but it is a term liberally applied to mistresses. The other point is you are working very hard to slip through a crack in his marriage in an attempt to launch an affair. Typically, it is the other way around where the cheater comes on strong and breaks down the woman's resistance but the roles are reversed here. Why are you so determined to sabotage yourself?
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A
female
reader, sammi star  +, writes (15 February 2011):
 If it's hard to break contact with this man now then think how much harder it's going to be if you leave it any longer.
He is married. No matter weather he says he's unhappy I'm sure you're intelligent enough to realise that if he was that unhappy he'd leave.
Stay away from this man. Do you really want to end up being the other woman? Even if things aren't going well in his marriage he should be putting his time and effort into fixing it or at the very least have the decency to end things with his wife instead of spending the night with other women.
If his marriage ends then maybe there will be something for the two of you. Until then I suggest you stay away from him, stop letting him into your bed and remind ourself that this can only end in tears.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 February 2011): You're young and if you want to experience that kind of heartbreak, it's your choice, you don't really need anyone's permission. By my own personal experience? I met a man, we dated for a year, before he confessed to being married and unhappy. It took me two weeks to process, and decide if I should wait it out, continue with the relationship or walk away. I walked away. I don't regret meeting him and falling in love, but I am alot more cautious when it comes love.
Just know that he will never be trustworthy, reliable, and completely yours, if that is important to you.
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