A
female
age
51-59,
*helly77
writes:I am 39 years old and have 3 children, im seperated but i have been chatting to a man in scotland for over 6 months now on the internet. We have spoken on the phone and seen each other on web cam, we talk for hours every night. He has 3 grown up kids and is divorced, he wants to meet me but hasn't made any arrangements yet...He said that he has started a new job so he cant just get up and go when he feels like it. I dont want my children to meet him yet but i have got strong feelings for him, he feels the same as well...My problem is, he says he loves me and wants to meet me but after 6 months he hasn't done anything about it, we are 600 miles away and it would take 6 hours travelling time to meet me, so is he just stalling? or does he really want to meet me?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 September 2008): Dear Poster
This is a very difficult question to answer; internet dating and also long distance dating does have in general more problems and can be very complicated.
It might be that he is tied up due to work; it could also be due to various other reasons; I do not want to judge or speculate on that;
I merely suggest that you do take it very easy and be very cautious, specially before you expose him to your kids and confuse them.
I think you need to explain to him that if there is to be any future for this friendship to develop into a relationship something will have to happen and that if he does not make a plan and concerted effort, you should get out and meet other people; yes, remain friends with him, but no need to waste your time waiting for him; life is to short, you deserve to find somebody that can love you, value you and be there for you and enjoy life with you and your kids.
I know this might sound a little harsh, but really you have to take stock and you have to think about yourself and your happiness first.
Hope this is of some assistance!
Best wishes and keep SMILING!
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