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Is this lust more than love?

Tagged as: Dating, Site News, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (25 November 2008) 6 Answers - (Newest, 25 November 2008)
A female South Africa age 30-35, anonymous writes:

I've been with my bf foor 8-9 months now and we had sex in the 7th month of our relationship, I'm 19 and he's 23. Yes it was great and he said it was worth the wait.

Now the thing is, ever since we slept together he seems to be full of lust rather than love, I might be reading too much into this, he doesn't even kiss me any more but LOVES kissing me when we're alone... nd he once said "it's really amazing in your heaven" :D. He really loves me I know but I just feel he's clouded by lust now, he says things like how warm and soft I am and never misses to call me when we're supposed to hook up, I won't even have to call... so now I want to know, is he just excited that we're finally having sex or is it really lust, we've only had sex on two occasions.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (25 November 2008):

You're very welcome! Hope all goes well...enjoy the passion!!!!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (25 November 2008):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

lol thanx everyone, and just to clarify on the sex TWICE in a motnh, it's bcoz we don't spend a lot of private time together because of work, our schedule usually clashes so we see each other for nly a lil time almost everyday.

Friend Tom, i'm comfortable with sex and like i said,it was great ;) . And we talk a lot about our future together as he says he doesn't wanna fool around anymore, I also see a future with him :)...Just curious as to whether he's being lustful

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A reader, anonymous, writes (25 November 2008):

(smile) Twice in a month is hardly "ravenous lust", hon. Believe me, I know. I think he is just happy with the new intimacy. He sees it as a stronger bond between you. Are you uncomfortable with sex now? If that is the case, you should say so. If it is just the sex he is interested in, you would know soon enough. Usually, between two people in love, sex goes along with discussing future plans. Do you do this? Are you sure in both his and your longterm commitment? Have some intimate conversations along with the other. You may then be more comfortable with the physical intimacy.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (25 November 2008):

If it was lust then he would have been begging to do do it more often. I mean you've only done it twice in the space of 2 months! He still calls you, he still kisses you, I think he still loves you, but he's just excited about discovering this new side of the relationship. I wouldn't worry, a good sex life is important to a good relationship.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (25 November 2008):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Wow thanx a lot britt, lol i've actually forgotten that therz "passion". Thanks

mwah xx

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A reader, anonymous, writes (25 November 2008):

It's possible you are confusing lust with passion. Give it more time but I would insist on foreplay and kissing. If he doesn't kiss you, then you kiss him. I think he is just so anxious that he loses his mind in your "loveliness"

Don't over-analyze. There's lots of women out there who would love to have your problem!!!

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