Is this Jealousy or Hatred?

A male age 30-35, *non 29 writes:

When I was 12-14 years old (2006-2008), I had a crush on a girl which is one year younger than me. She also had a crush on me but then we stopped liking each other. After sometime she met with my friend and liked him. When we stopped liking each other, she did not know my friend yet, it was few months letter when she met him. One day I saw my friend and the girl with their youth centre friends(because they attend in a youth centre,I do not attend this group) and I told my friend if he knows that girl and vice-versa and they told me that they know each other. From now on things started to change. When I see the girl, she doesn't say goodbye or rolls her eyes. When I leave her a message on facebook, she does not reply to me. She started to call me with a nickname. She blocked me on msn and from then onwards I decided not to talk to her. One day my friend told me to go out with him to meet with this girl and some youth centre friends of them but before we went to meet with her, we met with 2 girls friends of mine and then when we arrived the girl told him where were we, and he told her with 2 girls, and the girl rolled her eyes, she did not like what he said. I did not want to go because I was not talking to this girl and because she was making fun of me but then I decided to go because I respect my friend. I did not enjoy the night, from that night I was sure that the girl had a crush on my friend, the way she looked and reacted at him. I told my friend to leave because she was getting on my nerves. From that night onwards the girl started to talk to me agian on msn, always asking about my friend because she told me that I know everything because I am his friend. She asked me if he has a crush on someone? If he is attending the activity of the youth centre. I always answered "I don't know". Sometimes my friend invited in a converstion with her and everytime he invited me, the first time that I meet him, he doesn't talk to me. He used to tell this girl what I tell him because I used to joke with him as friends do and she told him not to talk to me anymore. She told him that I used to joke with him because I hate him and because I am jealous of him and that is not true. The girl used to write on facebook that she wants the boy to be her boyfriend, she wrote " I am sad because" because he did not want a relationship from now although he liked her. He wanted to grow a bit. I used to joke with him by saying that he likes to boost himself a bit. One day, he asked if I was jealous of him and I told him no. I was hurt with that question. Sometimes he tells me if I hadn't talk to this girl on msn and I tell him "a bit" and he tells me "how rude words you told her about me" and I told him that I never said rude words about him. One day I told him that I was going to spend 2 days alone and he told me "What if the girl comes to you house and make out" and I did not answer him. When I asked him if he likes this girl he told me that he doesn't know and that this question is private. One day, I went out and some youth centre friends called me with the nickname that the girl calls me. She was making fun on me with the youth centre friends and spreading rumours. When we go out he always asks me what am I going to wear and how I am doing my hair. He aksed me how he looks in a photo and I told him that he did not came good and he told me that he will also upload the photo on facebook so that I would be angry and be jealous of him more, (that's want he told me) I started not to talk to my friend because he was being a bit fake. I started to go to a youth centre where I teach young teenagers with other leaders and my friend is one of the leaders. This is a different youth centre that my friend and the girl go. Now me and my friend have to talk because we are leaders and have to cooparate with each other. We talk each other but for a few minutes (I am not with that confidence anymore as I was before) I think that jealousy started to shine a bit. When we are in small groups for a game or for an activity we have to split up. I get a bit annoyed because some of the teenagers are with him, and when I talk he rolls his eyes. Sometimes he bring this girl and when he brings her he doesn't talk to me, he ignores me and preteding to be a cool infront of this girl. When we both have attention in the group he rolls his eyes and I admit I hate it when he is getting attention. He is influnced by the girl because I am sure she told him to avoid me. I am getting a bit jealous and hating him too. He is good in education, he is outgoing and I have to admit that he is a good looking but I am not gay. This problem is the fault of that girl because she wants him only with her, she is jealous of him. She hates me. Is this jealousy? Is he jealous of me? Should I tell him that I am being jealous? Please help me, although we are not friends, I do not want to fight like this because I know how outgoing and friendly he was. I do not want to loose him as friend. Should I talk to him at youth centre? That girl is the problem, I hate her

View related questions: confidence, crush, facebook, jealous, msn, split up

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