A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hello!to start with, there was a guy i met somewhere around march this year, at first it was all casuall, but later we both started to seriously like each other.all was well utill one day i pissed him off with something i said, and he just left, i havent heared from him since...i left him few messages but he didnt get back to me, im not sure if he red them.now im broken, i'm worried and sad because i think he wont talk to me ever again.and as for my question since that happened i cant sleep, i barely eat, im fed up and sad, ppl see this and start to ask what has happened. i cant concentrate on anything.i think those may be symptoms of depression.do i need to see a doctor about it?or is there a way to cope with it on my own?any serious answer appreciated.love Reply to this Question
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female
reader, chickpea2011  +, writes (18 September 2011):
 Hi,No, I don't think you have depression. What you have is a broken heart. I know all the symptom you describe are similar to depression, but how you are feeling right now is perfectly normal after having broken up with you boyfriend. We all been there, we all know exactly how you feel. It takes time to get over a love one, specially when you still having feelings for him. You need this time to be sad, let your emotions out, you are allow to feel this way. But, how long you are going go feel this way depends on you. Couples break up all the time, various reasons, but I think the problem here is that he didn't give you closure. I don't know your boyfriend, don't know what you said to him to upset him so much? But, in any relationship, rather you end nicely, or bad, usually couples meet, or have a last talk? Your boyfriend has a very strong personality. I don't know how bad you treated him, or what you said that made him so upset, but I wish he could have giving you closure, or last talk?Grieve as long as you need. But, the sooner you take the first step the better. I see that he has moved on, by not returning your text messages, and calls. So, do what's best for you, accept the fact that it's over, and make a new life. Don't contact him anymore, I know you want closure, but I guess he's not willing to give you that. Sometimes, you have to go on with life, without having any explanation. I know it's unfair?, but it's part of life. After you give yourself enough time to let you pain, anger out, delete his number, get rid of everything that he gave you, or reminds you of him. Keep yourself busy, make new friends, go out, spend more time with your friends, family, do things that make you feel good, and happy. I know how you feel, I just ended a 10 years relationship a year ago. I cleaned my room, re-organized everything, closet, got a new haircut, kept myself busy, went out, start taking care of myself, eating well, trying my best everytime I went out. Those little things made me feel better about myself, gave me energy, and helped me to move onHope this helps, hope you feel better soon...Good luck
A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 September 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionno i don't go all day long thinking about killing myself but i feel miserable.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (18 September 2011): you can accept my view on this or not.
from what i can tell the guy you met is not worth much. depression to me is just a joke. everyone handles themselves differently. those who label such emotions that you are going through or lack of as an illness, are running away from reality. you are coping every day of your life. no doctor needed."life is hard after all, it kills you." - i got that quote from my teacher :/
just continue on your own path, another qoute,"time heals all wounds." its extremely over used but still true.
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A
male
reader, Sickpuppies5  +, writes (18 September 2011):
 You forgot to mention how long it's been since he left, but I'll try to answer as well as I can. Depression goes further than most people think. As I red your story I would say your just kind of heart-broken, or love sick. If it's been a few days, I would say give it some time, if he loves you he'll reply to your texts. If it's been weeks, I would say do your really want to continue a relationship that is damaged like that? Also, you might feel lonely and/or sad now. But as they say: You forget love if you find it again. But now to the real question. Depression is to the point where you think about jumping in front of a train every single day. Where there is nearly no good thing in your life. You wake up every day feeling like your not worth anything to anyone and you don't even care if you hurt someone by killing yourself. Are you really up to that point? Or is it just because your hurt from love? Deep inside, you'll know. If you really feel like your depressed, you should contact your doctor. I remember him being very understanding when I came to him for depression. And I felt like I did a good thing by going there.
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