A
female
age
36-40,
*weetheart1nonly
writes:Ok I complained of twitter before that he tweets a lot but majority said it does not really matter. Now it is an ex he, my man is tweeting "Night night lil mama. Hit me up". I know majority would say it is just twitter but this is how it starts and before you know it, something happens.I dont know if this is a red flag or it is just me being unnecessarily paranoid also because of the long distance?P.S.- He has not really done anything wrong for me to be suspicious and always proclaiming his love for me. he was even the one that told me about her, that she hit him up. I don't want to be left in the dark, as the saying goes, fool me once shame on you (pertaining to first ex), fool me twice shame on me (him now).
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reader, anonymous, writes (3 August 2011): first off why are you allowing this.. to me thats total disrespect.... if he wants to be contacting his ex then he needs to be single.. because like u said it starts out as friendship then leads to more things... and remember they have a sexual past so you need to let him know that you feel uncomfortable and if he dont like what you say and keeps messaging her then that will be your answer!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 August 2011): You're right, most relationships, not to mention affairs, start out as 'friendship'. And while your boyfriend and his ex haven't engaged in intimate conversations that you know of, I personally find 'Night night lil mama. Hit me up" a bit too familiar for my liking.
The only men I've been involved with who kept in touch with an ex did so because they had children with them and only for that purpose. It was amicable, but they weren't close. I didn't keep exesin touch with exes either. So this keeping a former lover around as a friend business is a bit alien to me.
Although I did have a cousin who maintained such a friendship. This friend was close enoguh to the whole family that she attended weddings and funerals. But then she was closer to the family than to him. They certainly weren't texting and twittering each other. This arrangement seemed to work out, but it seems to be the exception and not the rule.
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