A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I've been talking to this guy for like three months and then he fly over to see me and we had vacation together for a month. we had the best time ever. we had fights sometime . well it's happened like almost everyday speaks about some silly little things that we try to understand each other. he told me nobody ever being this nice to him he was ready sweet.Then he go back to his country(he wasn't in his country before he came to see me he need to start his life over again after being away for two years finding a new job meeting his friends and family . He didn't promise me anything after he left though but again I really go like him and I want to make it work so I offer about going to his country and getting a job there for about a year. he didn't deny at the first place also didn't say anything so I went emotional saying like you never ever want to be with me bedside you would be very happy of me about me going there .he said that we had fight almost every single days when I was there if you came over and we had fight I'd feel really guilty because you came all the way over to make it work .after he left we kept having this kind of conversation over and over again and he keeps saying that he doesn't know.and he doesn't want to talk about it yet it's too much for him right now.so I think about I can go cut him off since I don't see the pointof us still continue talking.he said he understand.so I went crazy again.for me I think he shouldn't let me go that easy then I darius I can't.I'm sort and let start over.he thinks that doing that wouldn't make any different because we always end up having the same conversations and he doesn't see long term about us anymore because we have doesn't way to solve problems.but I said I'm sorry.I still want to have you around.then we start ed to have normal conversation again.yesterday he read ask my journal that I wrote for him since we start talking.heard he sorry he didn't measure up ask the long term things with me like I hope it would be.I said I don't know about that.I just like the feeling wheb I'm with you.that'swhy I still have a little hope of him would want me to go to see him in the future but I don't know what would happen with my life to.so I think ever happen happens.he said Is there any chance he would change his mind about us? Should I keep waiting and anything I can do to make him want me more and more and don't make him feel more pressure? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 March 2012): The guy never made you any promises so it's inappropriate for you to put these demands on him! You guys had a fun time and that's all it was. If you are wanting more from guys, only date the ones who are wanting to settle down and get married and don't have sex with them until they commit to you. It's your responsibility to find that out from them before you start assuming stuff...like sex and flings make men fall for you...hardly. This guy you were with for a month from another country does NOT OWE you a future or some overseas commitment. Move on and please date more responsibly. The best use of the internet is to quickly meet guys in person to see if your goals match, not allowing them to email their way into your emotions and into your bed! Please save the "getting to know you phase" to dating them in person and if they can't meet you after a couple of exchanges, then move on. No lengthy, soulmate emails and chats from now on. Save that for the guy whose been busy taking you out on dates for a few months and is offering you a commitment.
A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (29 March 2012):
 It sounds to me like he has made his mind up however hard that is for you. You both argued a lot and he saw that and felt like it would never work between the both of you, he doesn't want you to move to be with him because he feels the both of you would not work out. As hard as it is I think the best thing to do is to forget about him and try to move on.
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A
female
reader, oldbag +, writes (29 March 2012):
 just leave him alone your putting pressure on a man who doesn not need it.You cannot MAKE him want you If he thought it would work he would have wanted you in his country but he didnt.He doesnt want rows and you going mad You should let him go.Find someone new to make you happy This relationship has gone as far as it can xxx
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 March 2012): He doesn't see a future in the relationship and he's made in pretty clear already. Quit waiting and move on. He isn't the right man for you.
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