A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hi, im new to dearcupid, and right now i really need advice. back in january, my boyfriend broke up with me for somebody else, we dated for about a year and a half and we went through so much together. when we broke up, he told me that he wanted me out of his life, and i told him that i would never speak to him again if that's what he wanted. so i cut off all contact with him. then one day out of the blue, he im's me and says hi. so i say hey back, and why are you talking to me?, hes says fine then i wont talk to you, so i say well i dont mind, so then i end calling him to talk to him, he tells me that he is no longer dating that girl, then i end up going to see a movie that night with him, the next day i end up going to play ultimate frisbee with him and his friends and have lunch. then we constantly talk and text over the next couple of days then he invites me over to have dinner and hang out with him and his friends, well his friends aren't able to make it, we just watch a movie and have dinner, then he starts like putting his arm around me and i have a kinda what are you doing attitude about it, then we started to talk and get closer, and i slept with him that night, he hasnt said anything about this incident, so my questions are does he still care for me? or is he just using me? is there any chance that he might want to get back with me?, sorry im longwinded about this, but i really need advice about my situation, so thank you all
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female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (4 April 2010):
 Sometimes ,when a thing is no more there, we will only know what we have missed it.
When it was there , we did not know how to appreciate it but only take it for granted.
Sometimes, a relationship breakups because it teaches us to appreciate the next one .
Deny him sex and see if he still cares about you . Let him chase after you and don't initiate any contact with him.
A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (4 April 2010):
 He can't just break up with you, date another girl, and come back to you if nothing had happened. The possibility is that the date didn't work out, he felt bummed so he needed you to feel confident again. You gave yourself too easily and he felt wanted again. He probably asked his friends to leave to have a setup date with you. I wouldn't get back with him. He didn't even want to apologize and take back his words, but expected you to be the same old girlfriend he once had. He doesn't care for you. It's just better for him to hook up with you again than be alone. If he saw another girl he fancies you can be sure he won't talk to you again for a while. Don't act angry with him. Never respond to his messages again, even if he's asking you why. Don't bother arguing with him and let him trick you into talking again.
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A
female
reader, Moo's Mum  +, writes (4 April 2010):
 I think the major question here is do you really want to get back together with him? Rekindled relationships can work but 9 times out of 10 they don't and the participants end up being even more heartbroken than before. Remember the reasons he broke up with you in the first place will still be there. Also the fact that he left you for someone else is going to create major trust issues for you.
Good luck doll hope it all works out for you!
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