A
male
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:Dear Cupid,So recently, my gf keeps asking me how to masturbate. Me and my gf are very open to each other she always asks me for advice. But I don't know what should I say to her. She said that she's afraid to stick her finger in there. I said that we should have sex instead since we never do it. But she said she's not ready. I'm understanding so I'll wait for her to be ready. So, is there any way she could masturbate without sticking her finger in there???Thanks in advance??:3
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (24 July 2012):
 I wish she was the one who was on here asking this question.
Probably one of the most inefficient and non-effective ways for a woman to masturbate is to stick a finger in her vagina. The vagina itself doesn't have many nerve endings of its own. The majority of women do not experience orgasm even through vaginal intercourse. While it feels amazing for you to insert your penis into a vagina, it doesn't feel the exact same way to a woman, especially a virgin (I'm guessing either she or you both are virgins?)
It's good to get to know her body and what gives her pleasure, but asking a man will never get the answer she's looking for. The best thing you could do is to point her to sites on the internet (*NOT* porn sites!) that offer advice and techniques on female masturbation.
There are also really good books devoted to that subject too, like Sex For One, The Joy of Solo Sex, I Am My Lover, and Good Vibrations (this one focuses on using a vibrator for stimulation). You could get one for her off of Amazon or wherever.
You're right though. If she gets really familiar with how to pleasure herself, you as her boyfriend will reap the benefits of that, as she'll be better at showing you what she needs as well as being able to let herself go easier with you. It's a myth that if a woman is good at pleasuring herself, even with a vibrator, that she won't need a guy or think him to be inadequate. Nothing is farther from the truth!
You could always point her here! The aunts on here are fantastic at giving advice on many subjects, including this one!
A
female
reader, curious1987  +, writes (24 July 2012):
 there are plenty ways to masturbate per say. rubbing of breasts and nipples, clitoris, her bum, basically watever turns her on. each perzon is different
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 July 2012): I agree with the first post, she can rub her clitoris. I would not have sex until she is able to finger herself. If she is too scared to do that, how on earth will she have sex with you? She needs to figure out what she likes before having sex. You should probably be more informed about it too as far as what you like, what she will like. And plz when you are ready to have sex dont just stick it in and expect her to like it. Take your time, make the effort so you both get properly aroused, lots of foreplay ect. Best wishes oh and make sure you take care so u dont contract stds
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 July 2012): She can rub her clitoris.
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