A
male
,
anonymous
writes: I'm 19 and have been in a relationship with a 16 year old girl for almost a year. I'm at University and she's going to start college next year.Whilst I live away, the distance has never really been a problem as we would normally see each other at weekends.However, recently it's becoming harder and harder to be apart from one another. I call her every day but most nights she cries herself to sleep through missing me, and I hate it.We both realise how young we are and that our relationship is still very much in the early romantic stage,but we seem to be getting more and more devoted to each other.We have a really mature sexual appetite for each other and there's such a connection between us.We've even talked about marriage and kids in a semi-serious way but know that it's still way too soon for any of that. I find myself thinking about her all the time and I'm totally in love with her.We've both suffered from friends and family belittling and dismissing our relationship because of our age.She makes me happier than I've ever been before, regardless of her age. When she says how she feels about me, she speaks with such conviction and emotion that I have to believe that she's for real. Are we just kidding ourselves, and is this romantic bubble of bliss going to burst at any time? Or is there an actual chance of a real future together?Thanks for reading x
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (29 May 2006): I am in a similar relationship. I am 17, and so is my loving girlfriend. We first met through AOL Instant Messenger through some friends, about 2 years ago. As we talked, we realized that we had so much in common, it couldn't just be a coincidence. Pretty soon, we started calling, and exchanging pictures of each other through the internet. After about 4 months however, we decided that it would be a while before either of us could drive, our parents were busy, and we were just too young. So, we tried going out with people who live in the same town as us. We were happy with our new partners for a year and 7 months, but the feelings kept coming back. My long-distance lover and I couldn't forget each other and realized that we truly loved everything about one another. Now, we are together again, and happy that we're getting our drivers licenses' real soon. I beleive that if you truly love the other person, then you will one day be with them.
A
female
reader, chunky_monkey +, writes (25 May 2006):
If you both love each other then yes there is a future. To relate to my life, im 18 and my boyfriend is 20. This past year he went to college while i finished highschool. We were separated by distance of 5 hours. What we believe is that if we can survive a long distance relationship we can survive anything that life throws at us. Now my boyfriend and i are past your relationships point to where we are looking at engagement rings. This is why i see a future for your relationship. First or young love can work because you grow up with them through differemnt stages of life.
Good Luck
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A
female
reader, Bev Conolly +, writes (25 May 2006):
I don't want to be the one who bursts your bubble, but you do understand --I hope-- that this romantic phase of your relationship will eventually wear off, right?
If you recongise that the crying-herself-to-sleep and calling-every-day gradually shifts to a less intense level of love and affection and accept that that's good and normal, then the next question to ask yourself is, what else has your relationship got going for it, besides intensity?
If you have lots of things to say to each other, and lots of shared interests, and you each respect and care for the other person, whilst not being suffocating... then you have a very good chance of a long relationship.
Your ages aren't really relevant, except to note that you're both of approximately the same generation (check!) and over the age of consent (check!). Feel free to ignore the nay-sayers.
First relationships (taken collectively) don't normally last all your life, but that's not to say that they *can't*. You may have found a person that you want to be with for all time. But my advice would be not to assume this is so, because every relationship feels like that at the start; just enjoy what you have and don't focus too much on the distant future.
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A
female
reader, ShortandSweet? +, writes (25 May 2006):
Sweetheart; you soundso sincere. You are so lucky.Hang on in there - you are both a little young, but time will tell. Plenty of things to see and do while you are young, but if this is meant to be, it will happen xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
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A
male
reader, scoutZor +, writes (25 May 2006):
In my opinion, i would say there is hope in any relationship. No matter what the situation might be. In response to the friends and family "belittling" you because of age, i do not understand this because they find it out for someone 21 to be with someone 25, but not 16 with 19? I do believe she is a little young, and can just be having a crush, but at the same time no one can truely predict someones feelings. I think if you two just work at it, you can accomplish anything. As someone else answered, good things come to those who wait. Believe it will happen, and anything can happen. Just dont do anything stupid that you might regret in the future.
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A
female
reader, the_one_2_talk_2 +, writes (25 May 2006):
of course there's a future! as long as you believe! I understand it's difficult because you're both young and yet still living your life! Just think positivley, and at night, just think, we'll be together properly soon, all good things come to those who wait. She has to understand this as well. Instead of crying tell her to imagine your future and/or your past memories together. I hope it works out and what i have said is of any use to you. good luck!
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