A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I don't know if the guy I like feels the same about me. Here's the situation. I have known him for a long time, not well, but we have been aquantances for years. When I was a teenager I hooke up with one of his friends and that's how we officially met. Then a few years later, many years ago, close to a decade, if not a little longer, I saw him in the bar and took him home with me. We fooled around a bit, made out a lot, but when I tried to initate sex, he told me that he didn't want to sleep with me unless there was something more than a one night stand between us. Then we sort of lost touch for years, because this was before social networking. But I found him on Facebook and we started chatting more recently. We texted on and off for months before we were actually able to meet up in person. He live two hours away and we both have busy schedules. But when we did meet up it was fairly casual, as the day progressed we were drinking and he became more attentive, very touchy, even holding me while we watched a Grandstand show. We kissed a couple times and instead of following the plan to go home that night, my friend and I went back to his place with his friends. We stayed up for a bit longer and he and I cuddle on the couch, all his initiation. When it was time for bed he took me to his room and we just cuddled all night, talked for a bit and slept. He didn't try to get in my pants, just kissed me on the back of my neck before we fell asleep. The next morning when I woke him and told him I had to leave he pulled me back into bed and asked if I was sure I had to go, but I had to work that day, so I did. When we left, I hugged him goodbye and he hugged my friend goodbye. When I got home, I sent him a text thanking him for having us over and letting him know it was good to see him again. He finally replied two days later with a text that read "It was great to see you also. Anytime you want to come to the city give me a shout." Then I didn't hear from him again for a couple weeks and finally texted him asking if he wanted to join me and my friend for an outing in a central location for both of us. He had plans already so couldn't come. Then I suggested we should try to get together on my next days off and he told me he would keep it in mind, but may have other plans, I asked him to keep in touch and let me know, and I haven't heard from him since. That was about two weeks ago. I really like him, but want to take it slow, get to know him better before anything happens but I don't know if he feels the same. So, I just want to know what is going on. It seems to me that he likes me too, but the lack of phone contact has me concerned. Is there a male out there who can give me advice on how to proceed, or just give up?
View related questions:
facebook, one night stand, text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, monties  +, writes (24 September 2013):
I only have one thing to say to you: he is just not that into you. When a guy likes you, you wont be staring at your phone waiting for him to text you or give you a call. You WILL have that attention. You will not be on here trying to figure out.
Also, remember the golden rule that she who texts first loses! You need to show him that you have other things and he is replacable. Guys go crazy knowing that.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 August 2013): yes, I agree with the last poster. if he was really into you he would have shown more interest. I belive he looks at you as a friend. the fact that he didn't try to get knto your pants when the circumstances were appropiate tell me that either he is very shy or he really is good guy.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 August 2013): What you have is a casual attraction. He fills you into his social schedule whenever possible.
He does like you as a friend and a woman; but I don't think it goes as far as a real romantic attraction.
You should never gauge a man's feelings when he is under the influence of alcohol. Alcohol lowers the inhibitions; and you may do things you wouldn't do when you are sober and in full control of your faculties. You may be amorous or obnoxious. That isn't your true personality, it's the alcohol.
He has an affection and fondness for you. I wouldn't read too much more into it. If the interest was more serious, you would hear from him more frequently.
I think his work schedule and his normal life-routines may not afford him time for a relationship at this time. He enjoys his single status, and doesn't want you to take his interests too seriously. He will be affectionate toward you when he feels like it, but he isn't looking for a girlfriend.
That is how I read it. That is how men generally are.
...............................
|
