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female
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anonymous
writes: In Love with two guys...Ive been seeing my boyfriend for 3years now, I love him so much, I know he'd do anything for me and he'd never hurt me... but to be honest Im bored, we like very different things but most of the time I just give in and do whatever he wants....which is usually sex. I really do love him and I wouldnt even be questioning our relationship except I meet someone else a year ago. Nothing has ever happened between us, we just email sometimes when we dont see each other, but Im crazy about him, we have so much in common and our personalities are so alike... I cant stop thinking about him, even when Im with my boyfriend.. I guess I just want someone objective opinion on this, because Im afraid that Im just lusting after the other guy and if I was to break up with my boyfriend Id make the biggest mistake of my life, I mean this is the longest realationship Ive ever been in, so maybe its normal to feel this way after 3years??? Please help?? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Ponungalungb  +, writes (11 September 2006):
 As you say, you are bored with your current relationship. Relationships have to be built on a strong foundation - more than just sex. To have common interests is important. At some point in time, the sex will wain and the common interests will carry the relationship. But if you have nothing else in common, or a foundation of sand, your relationship will suffer.
You say "I just give in and do whatever he wants....which is usually sex." That statement just doesn't have a good ring to my ears. It may be time to break from your current boyfriend and experience some new interests in your life.
Good luck!
A
male
reader, Lostandalone +, writes (11 September 2006):
 Well it seems to me you have become complacent in your current state of affairs. I think you do lust for this other guy maybe not just for the sex but for something different. If you have problems with your car you don't go out and buy an new one you fix the problem and keep driving. The same thing with your boyfriend. There is a problem and you're missing something there. Talk to him first and try to work out your current relationship first and if it can't be fixed than you move on. It seems that you haven't even tried to work on this thing. I mean what will happen with this new fellow once you it gets boring will you find someone else who excites you and keep this pattern until you are interested everyday. Well, I'll have to be the one to tell you. Relationships take work!!! It just doesn't happen by itself. What you put in is what you get out. You will always meet fun and interesting people that doesn't mean you drop who you are with to be with them to satisfy that urge at that time. Work on what you have and then if that doesn't work move on but don't critcize or throw in the towel if you haven't given it a good effort. Don't you think "love" deserves more attention? I hope this helps. Good Luck.
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