A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I really would like your advice.I did something hurtful and rude to my friend. It was an impulsive act and I regretted it immediately. I mailed her two weeks ago to apologise. I would like to apologise in person too. Though not the best of friends, we have been friendly these last five years and I am very, very sorry for hurting her. She has always been kind and very welcoming and did not deserve my bad behaviour. I just don't know how she will react. I am planning to message her on Monday asking to see her for a little while. Do you think this will be a good approach? What would you do if someone behaved badly and had no excuse for it? My friend is very particular and I admit I am a little scared (not the best word). She is also 8 years older than me. I behaved very immaturely, reacting to something I believe to be true. Not so from their perspective. Is there a way to make up?
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male
reader, Sageoldguy1465  +, writes (18 February 2016):
 Did you "mail" her by email? ... or REAL mail (a card)?
If the former, then you are not off-the-hook for apologizing... since an electronic apology is not nearly as sincere as a real card apology.....
If the latter..... then you need to wait six (6) weeks, then call and offer the apology, again. IF that gets deflected.... then the friendship is over...
Good luck...
A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (17 February 2016):
 I guess it is up to your friend now if she wants to forgive you or not. It is worth a try messaging her and asking her to see her in person. Maybe buy her some flowers, chocolates or even a bottle of wine as a peace offering. Saying sorry is okay but meaning it is another thing. Explain to her why you did what you did and apologize tell her it will never happen again and keep to that.
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